I met the bride about 2 years ago. My husband is friends with the groom and we started doing things as couples when he (groom) met her about 2 years ago.
She and I hit it off right away and during the first year we got to know each other. During the second year we were talking every week, excited to talk to one another and would excitedly make plans for the weekend. We'd go shopping together and have couples dinners at each others' houses almost every weekend. We'd both volunteer intimate information and talk about our men and we'd laugh hysterically, as we had the same sense of humor. I could not help but assume that we were pretty close friends. If you saw us you'd think we were best friends! I remember thinking that when she got engaged that I would probably be in her wedding, that's how close we were.
Then she got engaged and completely stopped calling me. I was totally confused but I thought I should be considerate of her because she now has a wedding to plan. I'd continue to call her to say hi and she'd sound a bit distant. So I backed off a bit in order to give her time to focus on the wedding. She still did not call me, not even for the tiniest of phone calls. Without her calling me, we didn't get together anymore either.
I continued not being a pest - that's what I felt like everytime I would call her. Months went by and she still did not call me. At this point the only time I'd talk to her is if her fiance (our friend) would stop by and she'd call to talk to him and he'd hand the phone to me. She never initiated this. She always used to. I have not seen her except TWICE in 9 months - and both times it seemed as if she figured she had to show her face at some point. She was not her usual self either.
She had her bachelorette party recently and I was not invited. I was hurt but I am trying to be a good person and assume that she preferred her other closer friends only and that it wasn't a slight against me. Now I'm wondering if she used me (and my hubby to "get in good" with our friend (now her fiance), right up until her engagement.
Was it wrong of me to think we were so close that I'd be invited to her bachelorette party? I can understand not being in the wedding party, but I just feel like such a dope for assuming we were at least close enough for her to want me there at her party. I've even met her other friends and we get along great!
I am not sure what to make of her behavior. Should I feel used? I can't help but feel snubbed and ignored. Should I now consider this friendship a very acquaintence-type of friendship and cut my losses? And would you feel offended at not being invited to a b-party? I will feel weird with her from now on - IF I ever see her again! This is crazy. How would you feel?
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Sep 23, 2006, 2:25 PM
Post #2 of 3
(896 views)
Re: [Alina2] Not invited to bachelorette party
[In reply to]
The only real way to find out is to ask. I would call her and ask her outright. Honesty IS the best policy. Perhaps you can ask her if there has been anything you've done that changed her feelings about your friendships. Alternatively, and less directly, your husband could ask his friend and hopefully he'd be candid with his response.
You should note that the bride may have not made up the guest list for the bachelorette party. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
expertplanner
BRIDAL CONSULTANT
Sep 23, 2006, 2:41 PM
Post #3 of 3
(895 views)
Re: [Alina2] Not invited to bachelorette party
[In reply to]
I completely agree. Just ask her. Rhonda Allen, Bridal Consultant New Beginnings Weddings
Not invited to bachelorette party
