I need some guidance on making a decision. I have 2 older sisters. Since we were younger we've always said we would each have one of the other be a "maid-of-honor" so we would all get to have the title at some point. However, since I got engaged last month, NO ONE in my family seems happy for me, no one speaks about it, and everyone is trying to tell me I should wait and not have it the fall of 05. But what is really bothering me is the fact that, even though my sister's don't know that I know...they hate my fiancé. One even said that we would have re-occurring rolls on cops for domestic violence. They insist that the has me "brain-washed" and it REALLY hurts to hear that from family, especially when NONE of it is true, I'm not sure why then even think that?! I can't take any more of their criticism & comparison to their relationships. I never knew people would try to control your relationship – when they have never shown the slightest interest in mine. So...to wrap up my question...I guess, I don't feel that I want either of my sisters as my maid of honor, since they have backstabbed me, and then turn around and pretend everything is fine. But I don't want to have a family grudge...Any suggestions ??? Thanks. Sara
(This post was
edited by SaraS825 on Sep 20, 2004, 10:39 AM)
You can ask anyone you wish to be your MOH, it doesn't have to be either of your sisters. I was wondering, though, if your entire family seems to feel as if your fiance is dangerous, could he be? Just a suggestion, but, perhaps it would be in your best interests to slow down and take a very critical look at your relationship. Sometimes it is easier for others to notice a problem from a distance than it is for us to see close up.
Take care and best wishes, Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
I agree with Rebecca. Speak to your family and ask them why they feel the way they do about the fince. They could shed some light on what you mkight be missing. Yiu don;t have to share this information woth the fiance but do give it some thought. Your family loves you and I am sure they have only your best interests in mind. What would they have to gain by these negative feelings? Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Jill
Psychotherapist: Second Weddings & Stepfamilies
No need to make any decision yet - why not wait and watch and see if family attitudes change. It sounds as if you come from a close and loving family, so don't rush, but try to find out what is really happening and why they feel this way. Jill Curtis Psychotherapist, Author How to Get Married ... Again (A Guide to Second Weddings) London, UK http://www.familyonwards.com
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