I have a friend that I have decided I don't want in my wedding. Everyone agrees that she might try to ruin the wedding or will try to take total control away from my mother and myself. To top things off no one can stand to be around her for more than an hour or two.
She has already voiced her disapproval for me marrying and said she had her feelings hurt because she is not involved more. Some people have said I should tell her we are running off to marry and others have said just tell her the truth. What should I do??
Thanks for listening!
Ladycat
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Post #2 of 4
(1799 views)
Re: [ladycat] Don't want friend in wedding
[In reply to]
It's easy for an outsider or someone who is not the friend of this person to tell you what to do. Only you can decide what this relationship means to you and act based on those feelings. If your "friend" is as unpleasant to you as she obviously is to everyone else just do not invite her to be a part of the bridal party. Only discuss it with her if she asks directly and then, tell her the truth. However, if you like this friend and want to keep the relationship you probably should have a "heart to heart" with her BEFORE she starts to get pushy or unpleasant. If, during the planning she becomes a problem, take her aside and firmly, but politely, tell her so.
It's nice that you are considering everyones feelings in this matter. Too often the bride's concern is only for themselves and "their day". Remember that everyone who loves you should be considered. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Post #3 of 4
(1783 views)
Re: [ladycat] Don't want friend in wedding
[In reply to]
I absolutely agree.
I also believe that honesty is best, because more often that not people find out the truth eventually. Just a thought. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
mannersmith
Manners & Etiquette Expert
Post #4 of 4
(1699 views)
Re: [ladycat] Don't want friend in wedding
[In reply to]
Dear Ladycat,
This sounds like a friend you could do without. It is up to you whether you want to sever the relationship now or not. If you have already asked her to be in your wedding, it is a tough conversation to ask her to step down. The conversation should revolve around her actions and feelings...I know you do not approve of my marrying this man, so perhaps you would feel more comfortable as a guest rather than an attendant. If you have invited her to the wedding, but now wish to uninvite her, I would think twice. There is the chance she will be quite resentful. A better option is to assign a close friend who is not a member of the wedding party to supervise this woman to be sure she behaves herself.
Don't want friend in wedding
