Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
I wanted a big wedding but all the friends at my wedding will be my mother's bussiness or family , mostly cousions, that I never grew up around except the last ten year after I relocated all the way across the country I've lost touch with all my best friends and no one is coming all the way across the country for my wedding. Since I have no best friends I really do not know what to do any advice? Should I depend on alot of my family some is out of state as well. Yet I want a big wedding? Most of my family is old no flower girl or ring bearer either, since I never knew anyone this a sad lost to me , mostly clergy will be there and family this was my one wish and it seems like it may be getting messed up.
Jill
Psychotherapist: Second Weddings & Stepfamilies
Post #2 of 5
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Re: [Aangielynn] Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
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I am sure any little girl will be thrilled to be your bridesmaid. Perhaps business friends of your mother have a child longing to be a bridesmaid! Ask around .. and you will be surprised how many will want the honour of being included in your bridal party. Jill Curtis Psychotherapist, Author How to Get Married ... Again (A Guide to Second Weddings) London, UK http://www.familyonwards.com
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Post #3 of 5
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Re: [Aangielynn] Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
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You mentioned that you have cousins; ask them if you are begining to have a relationship with them now. Many brides ask women form out of state or even out of their country to be a member of their bridal party. Yes, not having them located where you are can be problematic but if you want to have a large bridal party you can come up with ways to aleviate these issues.
Honestly though, your bridal party should be made up of people you care about, and who care about you. The bridal party isn't just window dressing; they help you prepare by shopping with you, maybe hosting showers or parties, helping you dress on the big day, etc. I'd want to be sharing that with people I am familiar with like family members and friends. If you don't have any of these people it is okay to have just one attendant/witness. Explore the resons why you want to have a huge bridal party and make sure its for the right reasons. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
RevSusanna
Interfaith Wedding Minister
Post #4 of 5
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Re: [Aangielynn] Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
[In reply to]
Perhaps it would help if you made a list as to why you want a big wedding. Is it tradition you want? Is it grandeur, pomp and circumstance? In either case, it can be achieved with a limited amount of guests. I have seen many traditional weddings with all the trimmings with only 20-30 guests invited. Another question: Who is paying for the ceremony? If Mom is footing the bill, she may have something to say about it....understandably.
Go inward...to your heart. There lie all your answers.
Re: [Aangielynn] Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
[In reply to]
HI. I am new to this site, but was reading your story.
You are so sweet, and I am sorry your close friends
cannot come to your wedding.
Take heart! Remember, It is not as important WHO is there
as it is WHY YOU are there.
You are marrying someone you want to share your life with. Your hearts will become one in the eyes of God...and your journey together will have a wonderful beginning!
I am 50, and have been married 29 yrs to a wonderful man who I love dearly and who loves me. We drive each other nuts, but we are committed to each other.
Our oldest daughter is getting married Jan. 22nd to a super great guy who we absolutely love. It is definitely a match made in heaven.
We will have many family and friends, BUT...what I want to say to you to encourage you is...Keep your focus on the commitment you are making and how special it is that you both found each other!
Maybe in the future you can make a trip back to see your friends and introduce your spouse...
I pray you have a wonderul wedding and your heart is filled with much joy and anticipation for a beautiful life together!
Help!! Need Advice Please No Bridesmaids That are friends, No one but Relatives!
