I have been engaged for a while and have had my wedding date set for about 10 months now. My maid of honor recently became pregnant and happens to be due about 3 weeks before my wedding date. When she told me she was pregnant and when her due date was she made it seem like it was all good because she was due before the wedding. Well, last night she called me and told me that she might not be able to be my maid of honor because she doesn't know how she is going to feel and if she is going to be able to give me what I need. Well, it put me in a situation like "what do I say now"...not to mention if I have to ask someone to replace her who do I make is sound like "Well I didn't want you to be my MOH because I didn't ask you in the first place, but now I have no choice so..."
I really don't know what to do or where to go in our friendship from here. Help!
I don't know how long she's known she is expecting, but, give her some time to get used to the idea. Tell her (if this is true) that you still would like her to be a member of the bridal party as long as she thinks she can make it. Unless she has a high risk pregnancy, she should be capable of fulfilling her role. Tell her that you'd like to carry on and see how it goes. If she gets to a point where she feels she cannot fill her role then just leave her spot empty. There's no law that says you must have a maid of honor. All you really need are two witnesses. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
I do need someone in that position because I need someone to sit next to me on that altar. So, the longer it goes, the harder it is probably going to be to ask someone else.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Oct 6, 2008, 7:18 PM)
Why do you need someone sitting next to you on the altar?
I wouldn't ask her to step down unless both of you think that is best. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Actually, 10 months before a wedding is a perfect time to be asking others to be attendants. This isn't like you are asking anyone at the last moment. There really isn't a problem here.
It seems that your friend is a good friend indeed for not wanting to leave you with a person who might not be able to do everything a MOH usually does. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
I asked her 10 months ago. I now have 6 months until my wedding. The dresses have just come in and have also been discontinued so getting a dress for someone else is not an option.
Please check with your priest about needing to have someone on the altar with you. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
We agree that you should talk with your priest because the placement of the wedding party depends on what type of ceremony you're having. In a full nuptial mass, the bride and groom sit or kneel on the altar but whether the best man and MOH are also included seems to be something that varies from parish to parish.
MOH backed out
