My youngest sister is getting married next year. She asked me to be her Maid of honor, which I've agreed to happily. I've only been a bridesmaid in past weddings, so I'm not sure about what is expected of me. We live in different states, she up North and I'm down South. I'm sure I'll be expected to help organize a shower with the other bridesmaids. Please advise.
Usually, you are responsible for arranging a bridal shower and attends all pre-wedding parties although you are not expected to give a gift at each party. Because you are not in the area, you could work with the other bridesmaids to accomplish this. You act as the director of the bridesmaids ensuring that all are on the ‘same page’ for scheduling fittings, pre-wedding parties, and any other special planning.
The honor attendant pays for her attire, but not her flowers. You ensure that the officiate knows where to stand for the ceremony, arranges the bride’s train and veil, and holds her bouquet during the ceremony.
You may fulfill the mother of the bride role as the unofficial wedding organizer. During the ceremony you may act as gofer, running to gather items needed by the bride, take care of any gifts brought to the wedding, and will take care of the bride’s wedding dress, so the couple can leave directly after the ceremony.
You precede the bride walking down the aisle and hold the groom’s ring during the ceremony.
You may also sign the marriage certificate if necessary.
During the reception if there is a receiving line, you stand next to the groom, sit on his left at the head table, and are usually announced to the reception guests with the best man directly before the happy couple.
During the first dance, you would usually dance with the best man and may dance with the groom.
Looks like the first response covered most of it. I am a bride and am currently struggling with my maid of honor trying to do MORE than her responsibilities. Her wedding didn't go so well and i think she's wanting a chance to do it over with mine. What would be really really nice is to ASK your sister what are some specific things she wants you to do and if there are any things that a maid of honor usually does that she DOESN'T want you to do. For example, I am MAKING my wedding ivitations, shower invitations, etc. I have a theme for my wedding and I am making everything match (for scrapbooking purposes). So one of the things a maid of honor assumes as a responsibility is the bridal shower (sending invites, decorating, preparing, etc). Since i wanted to MAKE my invitations i had to tell her not to worry about it. Trust me, a little thing like shower invitations may seem very minor, but it is good to get all expectations and responsibilites clear as soon as possible. Just ask her. And DON"T FORGET...You'll have to give the toast at the reception. Think ahead for that one!!! Good luck. Congrats on the honor of being your sis's maid of honor!
Actually, you shouldn't be involved in any way in your shower. Not in any way. This would be like you hosting a party for you. Not good. I realize and appreciate your need for continuity, but this is considered very bad taste.
The bride's toast is an option, not an obligation. And, for those of us who cry at just the very sight of a puppy, this is a blessing. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
Maid of Honor Duties
