Other bridesmaids wanting to spend money I don't have
I'm the matron of honor in a wedding with 5 very wealthy bridesmaids. They are either single and living off daddy's money or married to executives. I'm a working mom barely making it, and the bride is my sister. As the matron-of-honor I'm very pleased to be in the wedding, but financially it's becoming a burden. The other bridesmaids are buying gifts for the bride and planning trips and parties and then "collecting" from all of us. I simply cannot afford to spend this much. How do I communicate this to the bridesmaids without looking like I'm poor-mouthing? And is it okay for them to just go spend money and then collect from all of us or isn't the maid of honor (or, in this case, matron) supposed to organize the parties? It is getting ridiculous (three parties are planned so far, and one out-of-town "adventure" where we'll all stay at a spa and buy the bride whatever she wants). Thanks!
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jun 29, 2005, 1:22 PM
Post #2 of 2
(927 views)
Re: [shughenry] Other bridesmaids wanting to spend money I don't have
[In reply to]
Dear Out of Money,
This is very poor taste on their part. They should not be organizing anything without your input. You are really in charge here. Plus, no one should hand you a bill for something you had no input on planning.
All of these pre-wedding parties are optional...every single one of them. So, if they want to spend their daddy's money, that is their choice. But, this is not something that you must share in, because these cannot be considered the traditional pre-wedding parties.
Yes, all attendants are supposed to attend all of the parties, but not when these are planned such as this. It seems as though you may just have to lay down the law and let them know that they are on their own if they want to do this. Jeez, I couldn't afford it.
As MOH you have the option of organizing and hosting the bridal shower and perhaps a bachelorette party. Neither of these has to be expensive and should not include a large number of people. You are the boss... second to your sister.
Other bridesmaids wanting to spend money I don't have
