I have a question. A few years ago when I got married, I asked my husband's sister to be a bridesmaid. We weren't particularly close because she was away at school and I didn't see her that often. I did this because I thought it was important and represented our families uniting. I wanted to have a good family relationship with her as well as my MIL.
Now she is getting married, and though she has room for 8 bridesmaids, I have not been asked to be one. I have heard that I will possibly be "guest book". Oh and my MIL says she is "counting on you (me) to help with the wedding since yours was so beautiful" Which of course is flattering, but it feels like I am supposed to do a lot of the work, but I am not good enough to be a bridesmaid.
I am hurt by this. I have tried to create a closer relationship with her through the years. I guess my question is am I over reacting? I know she shouldn't feel obligated. At the same time, it was never a question for me. My husband didn't have to request that his sister was a bridesmaid, it was a given.
It does sting a bit, but it really isn't supposed to be a slap in the face. We can never know why you weren't chosen. But, looking at it from a practical point of view, I honestly wouldn't want the "honor". It is expensive, stressful, and time consuming. And, sometimes being an attendant can actually hurt relationships. There are many horror stories right here for you to read. So, your SIL could be thinking about your budding relationship and not want any conflicts to affect the two of you going forward. Let's just hope that is her reasoning.
SIL in Wedding party
