My sister-in-law did not ask me to be in her wedding. When I married her brother 4 years ago (we are still married and have a 1 year old little boy) I was told I had to include her as a bridesmaid in my wedding, so I did even though we are not best friends. I would have never of heard the end of it if she had not been in my wedding. Now she is getting married in March 2008 and she has not asked me to be a bridesmaid and does not plan to, she says they simply do not have room for another attendant. She says the church is too small, but I have been in the church and there is plenty of room. My husbands other sister is also getting married in April 2008 and she asked me to be in hers. My son is the ring bearer in both, the first sister in law did not even ask me if he could be in it, she told me he was going to be. So, needless to say, I am a little hurt that I have been left out. While her and I are not best friends, I'm still married to her oldest brother and mother of her only nephew. Is she in the wrong for not asking me? Or am I being selfish? It's awkward trying on bridesmaid dresses for her sister's wedding and not hers, since they insist all shopping together. My husband is an usher in both weddings. I have told her that I was hurt, and she just brushed it off as no big deal and says they simply do not have room.
I'm sorry that your feelings are hurt but you must know that sometimes brides have to cut their wedding parties and guest lists. It's unfortunate but she's not obligated to ask you to be a bridesmaid.
With a one year old in a wedding party you'll want to be able to keep your focus on your little guy anyway. As I'm sure you already know, at that age they can be a handful. Kids are pretty unpredictable when it comes to formal event and performing.
Try not to be insulted or hurt and enjoy the wedding. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Thanks for the fast reply! It's just hurtful when you were told to have someone in their wedding and now they have brushed you off. My mother-in-law, her mother, actually told me I was in it, then a few weeks later said "well, no on second thought you are not." I even picked out bridesmaid dresses with my mother-in-law. It was all very very weird. Yes, with a one year old (he will be 2 and a half at the wedding) we will need to keep an eye on him! Thank you again!
I'm sorry that you were bullied into asking your sister in law to be in your wedding but that is all water under the bridge now. Try to find a way to let that pass. I had a couple of women in my bridal party whom I don't even know anymore.
Your mother in law misspoke. It wasn't her place to tell you, or not, that you'd be involved in the wedding. Sometimes people get overwhelmed by weddings and in all the excitement forget to do the right thing. But, we should always wait to be asked.
Glad we could give you a place to vent. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Sister-in-law bride-hurt feelings
