The bride is getting married in a week, and I am getting cold feet. I have been wanting to quit as bridesmaid for 4 months but didn't.
The bride asked me to be in the wedding after I had known for her for only 2 months. We hadn't even hung out together at the time. I foolishly said yes.
The bride mandated I throw her a local shower. She "suggested" menu item after menu item which I provided. I did as she requested and she still managed to find fault in the shower.
Now, my husband has been recently hospitalized (he got out last week) and has decided he wants a divorce (also last week). He didn't return home after his hospital stay, but he is in the wedding as an usher. My husband is definitely going to the wedding as he is a close friend of the groom.
It will be very awkward to spend nearly two whole days in close quarters with my husband when he refused to come home and will barely speak with me. I am also concerned about breaking down emotionally at the wedding or having a fight at the wedding. I am concerned about crying and ruining the brides' photos, which are the most important part of the wedding to her from what she has said.
The bride has offered twice in the past two weeks to let me step down as a bridesmaid. Can I do this? Is this her way of asking me to step down because we have grown apart? Or is she just being polite? As you can tell, we have barely talked at all in the last four months; I feel I have nothing in common with her at this point. The only thing she seems to care about is the wedding.
Before my husband was released from the hospital, he told me that I had to go the wedding.
What should I do?
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Oct 30, 2006, 8:33 AM
Post #2 of 3
(743 views)
Re: [bmnov2006] Too late to quit as bridesmaid?
[In reply to]
If the bride has already given you permission to step down than take that option. Does it matter if she was asking you to step down or offering at this point? Give her a call and explain that you are sorry, but, you just cannot attend. Just tell her as you have told us here. (I wouldn't worry about the attendants being an even number or the cost of the dress.) It's best that you are honest - especially since this is not your friend. I'm sure none of you want to be uncomfortable.
I'm sorry for your troubles. Take care. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Oct 30, 2006, 6:34 PM
Post #3 of 3
(718 views)
Re: [bmnov2006] Too late to quit as bridesmaid?
[In reply to]
I couldn't agree more. I think you need a break. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
Too late to quit as bridesmaid?
