My mother is insisting that she should throw a bridal shower for me because my sister is attending college out of state and she would not be able to attend a bridal shower in September or October. My wedding date is November. My MOH is out of town all summer long and cannot throw a party this summer. My mother is demanding my list and demanding that my sister (a bridesmaid) and herself throw me a party. I want my MOH to do it in the traditional manner. My MOH is more financially able to throw me a party, and she is the only true wedding party attendant. I allowed my sister to be involved due to pressure from my parents. I really do not want two showers because I feel they are tacky and defeat the purpose of the shower(Grooms side won't attend if MOH is not involved). I feel a tremendous amount of stress and frustration, because I feel that everyone else has ben telling me what to do and I have no say. If we weren't so financially invested at this point, we would just call it off and elope. I am at my wits end with all this nonsense. I am about ready to tell everyone not to throw me a party because I don't want to deal with this.
You have good instinct, so stay with them. You have etiquette on your side. Your mother and sister should not plan or host a shower. It is viewed as self serving, as they would try to garner as many gifts for family as possible. It is only human nature. So, you could ask your mother to either read any etiquette book or this site, which focuses on what is viewed as proper.
Plus, the wedding is no longer about the parents, even if they contribute. They are no longer financially responsible for any of the costs and no longer plan or invite. They may if you want help or offer them part of the list. You and your fiance are supposed to be in control.
Bridal Shower Dilemma
