I am one of three bridesmaids standing up. The bride lives in Utah, and her family is from Wisconsin. The three bridesmaids are holding a shower for her family in Wisconsin and the wedding is in Utah and we are not sure what is proper etiquette for the brides gifts.
Do we ask that people ship them to the bride, do we ask for attendees to help with shipping or do we not ask at all and let the bride figure it out? We would need to include it on an invite and not sure if we did something like that it would look tacky. And we do not want to offend the guests either. Any advice you have on "distant" showers?
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Post #2 of 2
(123 views)
Re: Out-of-town Bride for Bridal Shower
[In reply to]
Dear Laabsk,
It isn't polite to ask guests to ship shower gifts to the bride's home. This is like asking for two wedding gifts. So, the giftless shower would be the best choice since shipping gifts home might be expensive for the bride. But, this is her only choice unless someone is driving to her wedding and can deliver the shower gifts to her.
The distant shower is often not viewed positively, as it can appear as if the couple just wants to ensure they get gifts from those who cannot attend the wedding. The reasoning here is that many from their hometown may not be able to travel to the wedding and therefore are not obligated to give a wedding gift. But, they 'could' give a shower gift if attending a shower. So of course, they would be invited to a gifting shower--not nice in some circles. However, as long as all these shower guests are also wedding guests, the shower is not "against the rules" even though it might appear grasping for gifts.
Out-of-town Bride for Bridal Shower
So of course, they would be invited to a gifting shower--not nice in some circles. However, as long as all these shower guests are also wedding guests, the shower is not "against the rules" even though it might appear grasping for gifts. 