sister of groom also bridesmaid...etiquette for showers
I am the bride and I have six bridesmaids. My future sister-in-law is one of the bridesmaids. I have three showers being thrown for me (which I think is a lot). My mother's friends threw a shower for me which the Mother-of-groom and Sisters-of-groom were invited but did not attend due to a wedding that was out of the country. My fiance's aunts are throwing me a shower, which the Mother-of-groom and Sister-of-groom plan on attending. My bridesmaids are also throwing a shower for me as well. My fiance's sister has helped contribute to the cost of the shower, being a bridesmaid, but has declined to come to the shower. I was curious if this was proper etiquette, or being a bridesmaid, should she also attend the shower that is being hosted by the bridesmaids? Thanks so much for the advice!
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
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Re: sister of groom also bridesmaid...etiquette for showers
[In reply to]
Dear julz,
I wish the hosts would have read about hosting a shower before doing so. There are major breaches here. Three showers is one too many. Mom's friend shouldn't host unless she is also your very close friend. Hopefully there were no more than 35 guests (which is a big shower) and they are also invited to the wedding. Family shouldn't host either unless they are also attendants.
This is a huge problem because many showers are also gift giving events. So, essentially you are expecting your wedding guests to give you 2 gifts each. With more showers means more gifts. This fact doesn't escape guests. They do notice.
All of your attendants should try to attend all of your showers. The future sister in law should attend. But, there can be legitimate reasons she can't. It is best not to force the issue for the sake of family unity.
Agreeing to this many showers is a much bigger issue.
Re: sister of groom also bridesmaid...etiquette for showers
[In reply to]
The showers and hosting should be left to the host. The bride shouldn't be involved, except to decline the invitation to host the shower or if asked for a guest list. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
sister of groom also bridesmaid...etiquette for showers
