My 2 closest friends want to throw me a bridal shower. My mother and mother in law think it would be tacky to invite people to a shower but not the wedding (we are getting married in May with just parents only). I'm ok with not having one but my 2 friends are insisting. I hosted both of their showers and one of them eloped. They want to do just friends (all of who are ok with the destination wedding) and not family (most of who are NOT ok with the destination wedding). They came up with the friends only shower idea because of my mother in law and mothers thoughts. Again, I'm ok with not having one and I don't want to make the situation worse or hurt anybody's feelings. Anybody have any ideas or comments.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Nov 29, 2004, 8:19 AM)
It is perfectly acceptable to have a bridal shower for a destination wedding. This is one way your friends and family can share without actually being there. I feel that if you do the friends only that the family will be unhappy, so I'd invite all and let them make the decision to attend or not. Suggest the theme for the shower match your wedding destination, again allowing them to share in the wedding. Nancy Tucker President of Weddings Beautiful US http://www.weddingsbeautiful.com
Although many etiquette rules have changed as we change the way we marry, according to Emily Post's Etiquette, by Peggy Post, page 591 under "Who is invited?" this rule is still in place: "only those invited to the wedding are invited to a shower." The only exception is the office shower. Those with whom we work may host a shower for the bride and not be invited to the wedding.
Diane Warner's Contemporary Guide to Wedding Etiquette, pg. 62 states the same, except also includes club members who do not expect to be invited to the wedding. However, there is a website that says that it is fine for destination weddings.
In my opinion, when in doubt, take the traditional route. But, you will have to choose what is right for you.
One way to help those who are not invited feel as if they are a part of your celebration is to have a reception when you return from your wedding. There you could share a video or slide show of your ceremony.
Best wishes and congratulations on your up-coming wedding. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
(This post was
edited by Et.byRebecca on Nov 29, 2004, 2:36 PM)
Bridal Shower Etiquette
