How to tell the bride she should pay for attendants accommodations for cruise ship wedding?
My sister has decided on a cruise wedding. We have had a distant relationship for the last few years. She has not "asked" me to be her maid of honor but is already making demands of me, and assuming that I know I will be her MOH (and that my daughter with be her flower girl).
She has already asked me to pay for her guest arrival packs and wedding favors. She says I should do this because she paid for my wedding shower favors and because she does not want a shower or bach. party. I should just pay for these things instead. I of course refused to pay for these gifts and for the wedding favors. She sent me scathing emails for days.
She knows my husband and I will have to bring our children. She also knows that we have no options to leave them home with anyone. Knowing this, she continues to make me feel badly by making tiny comments, all the while insisting that she doesn't mind if we bring our kids. Her informal save the date welcomed everyone, and did not mention anything about kids. This cruise is going to cost our family a good sum of money, when all is said and done. She has not offered to pay a penny. She has no other attendants. We are making sacrifices in order to afford this. I have read that the bride and groom should pay for the attendants' accommodations. Is this the case? How can I bring this to my sister's attention. She refuses to read up on etiquette, at all. My mother has decided to stay out of it completely. As my sister's demands become more irrational, I am getting more more upset. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. (yes, you've read it all right) Thank you so much!
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Jun 19, 2008, 4:08 PM)
Weddings by Shayna
WEDDING CONSULTANT
Post #2 of 3
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Re: How to tell the bride she should pay for attendants accommodations for cruise ship wedding?
[In reply to]
You can bring up the etiquette of paying for accommodations (usually two nights), but for one thing, that's harder to do on a cruise because it's difficult to breakout costs for just the room or cabin. Additionally, there is no way to force her to pay for anything. The power that you have is to decline to serve as her MOH (which she hasn't even asked you yet) and/or decline to attend if the situation is truly so bad. Either way, you may have to weigh the impact of those deicisions on your future relationship with your sister before actually making any moves to confront her. Shayna Walker, Williamsburg Wedding Design http://www.williamsburgweddingdesign.com
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Post #3 of 3
(1323 views)
Re: How to tell the bride she should pay for attendants accommodations for cruise ship wedding?
[In reply to]
How to tell the bride she should pay for attendants accommodations for cruise ship wedding?
