Is it rude to stay in a hotel other than the one destination wedding is taking place?
My cousin is having a destination wedding at a hotel in Mexico. She is fairly thrifty, so it surprised me to find out that the all-inclusive hotel costs $200 per person, per night. Then I found out that the hotel is comping her the cost of the rehearsal dinner, wedding and reception since, basically, the guests are paying for it. She let me know that she would have to pay a fee for me if I attend the rehearsal dinner or reception but I was not a guest at the hotel. I love my cousin and want to be there for her special day. I'm also pretty sure that she would be hurt if I didn't go.
Is it rude to come to the wedding but find my own nearby accomodations, thereby making her pay some fee for my dinner? Between $350 plane tickets each for myself and my husband, plus 2 nights of hotel, this trip would end up costing about $1600, which is really steep for a weekend. I'll add that I got married a few years ago and my cousin and her fiance were guests at my wedding. It was out of town, so they had to stay at a hotel, but we offered choices and did not charge to attend the reception. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you!
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Oct 1, 2009, 11:55 AM)
Etiquette Now
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Re: Is it rude to stay in a hotel other than the one destination wedding is taking place?
[In reply to]
Dear Memanuel,
This is one of the biggest issues with the destination wedding and one I always caution couples about. Many, if not most, all inclusive resorts charge a day use fee for those attending the wedding events who are not staying at the resort. The couples are responsible for this fee, for as you point out, if the guest pays, they are essentially paying to attend. There should be no entrance fees for weddings.
So, it is your choice of where you stay. However, please make sure that your cousin intends to pay the day fee. It appears as if she realizes that it is her responsibility. But, I have heard of guests being turned away from the event because the fee has not paid by the couple.
Is it rude to stay in a hotel other than the one destination wedding is taking place?
