Hi. My neice is getting married to a Jewish boy; she is currently converting to Judaism.
My parents, as grandparents, feel uncomfortable attending as Grandparents are given special staus at the ceremony. Are there any issues in them attending and just attending like everybody else as they do not feel comfortable.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Aug 25, 2008, 9:22 AM)
What is making them uncomfortable? Could you provide more detail? Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
They are in their 80's and have followed the Catholic faith all their lives. Firstly, I think they are upset that their grandaughter is converting. Then they are being told that they would have to sit under the canapee for the service. I have suggested they dodn't sit there and just sit with everyone else. My father says that would be disrespectful to the Jewish religion. It is causing so much unrest for my sister who is caught in the middle of it. Added to the fact that they live in the north of England and the wedding is in London, I don't think they are that comfortable on making the long journey, I think that is not a big issue.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Aug 26, 2008, 8:06 AM)
We would suggest that your parents talk to their granddaughter and also to a rabbi to find out if there is another solution for this problem.
It is a great honor to sit under the canopy, but if this makes them uncomfortable, they should seek advice from those involved. Perhaps your sister could speak with the rabbi on their behalf.
They might also choose to go along with this ancient Jewish custom out of love for their granddaughter. This would not in any way deny their Catholic faith but would add to the joy of the wedding.
It is often the case that the older generation is uncomfortable with conversion or participating in rituals that they are not familiar with. In most of the interfaith Jewish-Catholic ceremonies I have conducted, only the parents stand under the canopy or the parents with the best man and maid of honor. Then I verbally honor the grandparents during the ceremony in a non-religious way. Speak to your Rabbi about this. This is a very viable option. Shalom! Reverend Susanna Stefanachi Macomb Author of Joining Hands and Hearts, Interfaith, Intercultural Wedding Celebrations, A Practical Guide for Couples
Catholic Grandparents/ Jewish wedding
