I have a very good friend that I want to ask to be my bridesmaid. WE have been friends for years. When she married she converted to her husbands relgion and practices it religiously. One of the terms of the conversion was that she would not partake in any Christian celebrations - including Easter bunny, setting up a Christmas tree, Christmas presents, etc. I will be having a Catholic wedding w/ a mass. Would I be insulting her by asking her to take part in this? Would I be forcing her to choose between a friend/religion? How strict or how far do the rules go when you convert? I know her husband is Orthodox. I dont know if a convert (like her) could be Orthodox, or some lower level. I really want her to be a part of my wedding party, but I dont want to put her in an awkward situation. Also, sorry I am not very familiar w/ Judaism and I apologize if my ignorance offends anyone.
Deacon Bob
INDEPENDANT CATHOLIC DEACON
May 9, 2006, 3:23 PM
Post #2 of 4
(1205 views)
Re: [mamaj] Jewish bridesmaid in a catholic wedding????
[In reply to]
I am on an expert on Jewish law. I know of families that have one Christian spouse and one Jewish spouse and they celebrate both holidays. Your friend seems to have converted to a stricter form. I think the best thing to do is speak to your friend and let her know your feelings. You expressed them very well in your question. Make sure she understands that while you very much would like to have her in your wedding party that you will understand if she can not do that. I am sure she will appreciate the honesty. Also, by speaking to the issue directly you will avoid any second guessing or hurt feelings. I am sure it will work out well. You seem to be very sensitive and that helps a lot. God Bless, Bob Deacon Bob Tousey
mamaj
May 9, 2006, 4:11 PM
Post #3 of 4
(1200 views)
Re: [Deacon Bob] Jewish bridesmaid in a catholic wedding????
[In reply to]
Thank you for your response.
RevSusanna
Interfaith Wedding Minister
May 9, 2006, 8:00 PM
Post #4 of 4
(1195 views)
Re: [mamaj] Jewish bridesmaid in a catholic wedding????
[In reply to]
It is my experience that if your friend has converted to Orthodox Judaism (if her husband is Orthodox, she most likely is too), and if she cannot participate in any Christian celebrations, she will not be able to participate as a bridesmaid in a Catholic Mass (a Christian sacrament and celebration.) She won't be able to do this either because of her own new found beliefs or because of the restrictions of Orthodox Judaism or because it would upset her husband.
However, as Deacon Bob says, you seem so wonderfully sensitive. If you are that close and feel comfortable speaking to her, please do.
Pehaps you can think of another way of including her...during the more secular activities.
Jewish bridesmaid in a catholic wedding????
