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Home: Second Weddings: Renew Wedding Vows:

Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal

 

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HeSays


Jul 21, 2008, 12:53 PM

Post #1 of 4 (375 views)
     Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal  

I am a self-proclaimed romantic imbecile. I would like to approach my wife of 24 years and re-propose a vow renewal. She's a romantic and would say yes if, and only if, I do something more romantic then to pop the question over the meatloaf dish.

Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal? And, if the diamond commercials are right, can I get a few suggestions?

Thanks in advance.

(This post was edited by TWQadmin on Jul 21, 2008, 5:41 PM)

TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT / Moderator


Jul 21, 2008, 5:46 PM

Post #2 of 4 (358 views)
     Re: Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal [In reply to]  

Dear Mr. Romance -

Most couples decide this as a couple, but I see nothing wrong about being romantic and asking your wife if she'd like to renew the vows you exchanged all those years ago. Where the diamond commercials miss the boat is that this is not a second wedding and by using the phrase, marry me again, couples get the impression that they can have another wedding.

With regard to suggestions, this is such a personal event that I think you need to come up with your own idea. Keep her personality in mind (some women respond to humor, others to poetry, etc) and plan a wonderful evening, just the two of you. From the way you speak about your relationship, I think no matter what you choose to say, she will say yes.

Let us know how it goes. Happy anniversary.
Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator -
"Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".

Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT


Jul 21, 2008, 7:47 PM

Post #3 of 4 (353 views)
     Re: Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal [In reply to]  

I completely agree. As an example, my husband likes to surprise me. So, he will plan something and write a little notes about it. He will put the note somewhere I will go in the morning after he leaves for work. One time the note was in the dishwasher! I love it.

When you begin your plans, please visit this page http://www.idotaketwo.com/vow_renewal_etiquette.html for the etiquette involved.

Good luck!
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now

PremaritalCoach
MARRIAGE/FAMILY COUNSELOR


Jul 22, 2008, 8:00 AM

Post #4 of 4 (342 views)
     Re: Is it customary to propose romantically for a marriage renewal [In reply to]  

Excellent idea, I must say, I am sure she will be very impressed. As for your two questions, I will leave the etiquette to those who know, I simply wanted to add my two cents on a few things.

When asking her to do this I would simply choose a location that is quiet, if she is more introverted or if she likes her privacy. I think picnics are exceptional and women are always impressed with the work that goes in to putting them together. Actually, I think you could even serve meatloaf if it was at a picnic or romantic setting, sort of Smile. Anyway, you know the location she likes, so just do it there.

Second, just a suggestion, but I would recommend writing your own vows, it is so personal. After 24 years of marriage I am sure you both would have things you would want to say, or even things you would have changed in your wedding ceremony vows. I think she would love it. Way to be a romantic.

John Rolf Jordan, M.A., M.Div.
www.ConnectionCare.com



 
 


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Nov 20 2008

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