Next Year is my parents 25th wedding anniversary. And my younger brother and I want to give them a vow renewal ceremony. Thing is my parents wedding was planned for six months later that it took place as well I happened and the wedding was moved up. it was quick and rushed and they never got to have the wedding of their dreams. Unfortunately they never had the money after they had us to go away on a real honey moon and thankfully enough they were wonderful parents who put us first, but never got to do anything for themselves. Now I am married and doing good for myself my husband and I own our own successful business. Point being I would like to give them the wedding they never got to have. I really want to recreate the wedding they always had wished they could have. I see some vow renewal things are inappropriate and some wedding recreations are different, so I am a little confused. I would love nothing more than to give my mother a simple dress but one closer to what she had always wished for and to get my father in a tux so they could have real wedding pictures. ( I have spoken to all of our family and they love the idea and think it is perfect not tacky is it okay?) Also if we are recreating their wedding my mothers sister who was the maid of honor has asked if she will have a "role" in the wedding, my fathers brother , the best man passed away two years ago his daughter asked about her brother standing in a "role" as best man? I know typically this is unacceptable, but if they are asking is it appropriate??? Sorry so many questions can't find these types of answers. I have anniversary bands for my parents to exchange during the ceremony and a dress I bought for Mom and altered without them ever suspecting what was going on they think I got the bands as my gift to them for the 25th and my Mom thinks I am finally using my new sewing machine and using her for my life sized doll. So they have no idea what is going on. I am just trying to figure it all out and make sure everything is okay before I do it all. Also they have always wanted to go on a family trip to disney and my husband and I want to give them that for their anniversary vow renewal honeymoon type thing is it okay to give them that for a gift if we are getting tickets and rooms for the whole family? or should they go somewhere alone? PLEASE HELP!!! I am completely lost
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Mar 18, 2006, 7:19 AM)
It is very nice of you to want to do this for your mother. And, since it is a surprise, it is very important that all of the elements are proper so she will not be embarrassed. It appears as if you have this same concern.
Although everyone you talk to about this may 'say' that they think it is appropriate, doesn't mean that it is what they really think. It is unfortunate. But, most of what you want to do can be done without it being viewed as tacky.
First you wouldn't want this to be a huge event. But, it sounds as if you are planning this to be a family event--perfect. Those close friends of your parents would probably want to be included as well. This is fine.
It is best to avoid having attendants. Their original attendants are fine, but it is still viewed negatively by many, as it is reflecting a wedding. We wouldn't want to completely recreate the wedding.
But, consider this. What if your aunt plays the oficiant role? Anyone can be. So why not her? How about you and your brother walking your mother down the aisle. This doesn't have to be done, as a procession isn't necessary for a vow renewal. But, this does reflect that the family is sharing the love that has developed over the years of this marriage.
A tuxedo is evening formal wear. So, please take this into consideration. Your mother should be dressed for the formality of the event. But, unless this is her wedding dress, she shouldn't be dressed in one. A very nice dress would be much better.
For my wedding, I wore a very nice stylish summer dress; it was July. It wasn't a wedding dress, but more of a dress someone would wear to the opening to an art show--white and dressy. It was perfect for the setting and my age. So, these are all considerations for your mother. Plus, this is a vow renewal and not a wedding.
I think your idea for the belated honeymoon is a great one. This is a time for family to be close.
My parents Vow renewal needs HELP!!!
Next Year is my parents 25th wedding anniversary. And my younger brother and I want to give them a vow renewal ceremony. Thing is my parents wedding was planned for six months later that it took place as well I happened and the wedding was moved up. it was quick and rushed and they never got to have the wedding of their dreams. Unfortunately they never had the money after they had us to go away on a real honey moon and thankfully enough they were wonderful parents who put us first, but never got to do anything for themselves. Now I am married and doing good for myself my husband and I own our own successful business. Point being I would like to give them the wedding they never got to have. I really want to recreate the wedding they always had wished they could have. I see some vow renewal things are inappropriate and some wedding recreations are different, so I am a little confused. I would love nothing more than to give my mother a simple dress but one closer to what she had always wished for and to get my father in a tux so they could have real wedding pictures. ( I have spoken to all of our family and they love the idea and think it is perfect not tacky is it okay?) Also if we are recreating their wedding my mothers sister who was the maid of honor has asked if she will have a "role" in the wedding, my fathers brother , the best man passed away two years ago his daughter asked about her brother standing in a "role" as best man? I know typically this is unacceptable, but if they are asking is it appropriate??? Sorry so many questions can't find these types of answers. I have anniversary bands for my parents to exchange during the ceremony and a dress I bought for Mom and altered without them ever suspecting what was going on they think I got the bands as my gift to them for the 25th and my Mom thinks I am finally using my new sewing machine and using her for my life sized doll. So they have no idea what is going on. I am just trying to figure it all out and make sure everything is okay before I do it all. Also they have always wanted to go on a family trip to disney and my husband and I want to give them that for their anniversary vow renewal honeymoon type thing is it okay to give them that for a gift if we are getting tickets and rooms for the whole family? or should they go somewhere alone? PLEASE HELP!!! I am completely lost 
