Hi, My husband and I married in the court house Feb 14th, 2003. No one was there but the court house officiate, 1 witness (unrelated), and us (of course). I never had the wedding that I had dreamed of. My husband doesn't really care too much, but I know that he had always wanted a wedding as well. We rushed the marriage for immigration reasons and because we are christian, so it is the right way to earn the right to live with one another if you want to be together. We plan to renew our vows, Feb 14th, 2009. By that time, we will have the money to afford the wedding we had always wanted. I will not have a big dress, but an informal wedding dress, my two daughters will be flower girls, and I will love to have my sister and best-friend to be attendants or bridesmaids. Is this o.k? Also, My husband wants his brother to be his best man? We want to enter the alter from to alternate sides and then walk down the aisle together. We also have a song picked out for the ceremony. And we plan on dancing together alone at the reception, as the first ones,and we have a song for that. We will also be giving out favors for our guests. How formal should the reception be and the food? Should there be any speeches?? Please let me know if these would be appropriate because we never had a wedding and I want to make this as close to the wedding I never had as possible.
Shelly
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Jun 17, 2007, 8:49 AM
Post #2 of 5
(1050 views)
Re: [cylawet] Renewing vows after 6 years of marriage
[In reply to]
Shelly -
Please review the many, many posts on this topic by using the search tool and by scanning the forum.
In essence, you are already married so having a ceremony which appears to be a wedding would not be appropriate. It's unfortunate that you did not have the wedding you always wanted but sometimes we must live with the decisions we make.
You can certainly have a vow renewal ceremony or a blessing of your marriage in church if you'd like to celebrate your happiness though.
Again, we have lots of posts regarding this topic. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jun 17, 2007, 5:38 PM
Post #3 of 5
(1042 views)
Re: [cylawet] Renewing vows after 6 years of marriage
[In reply to]
I completely agree. This should not appear to be a wedding. This can be very special though. Just don't include those elements that are wedding related. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
stacyalex35
Jun 17, 2007, 8:30 PM
Post #4 of 5
(1032 views)
Re: [cylawet] Renewing vows after 6 years of marriage
[In reply to]
I am dealing with the same issue right at this moment. I wrote to this site also and they say it isn't proper to do this since you are already married. I have been married for 5 yrs and I am my husbands (5th) wife. He isn't into it, but he is allowing me to do it, because he knows it would make me happy. I think you should do what you want, because I will. I appreciate the advice that was given me, but I still want to do it. It won't be a traditional wedding, there are alot of things that we are not doing, but in fact it is still a ceremony and it is kinda like a wedding. My friends and family are excited for me and can't wait to share this special day with me, because they could not the first time. I hope you have a great day, if you decide to do it, and I wish you and your husband lots of happiness in the future. It is a reaffrimation of your love to each other, and that is all that matters.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Jun 18, 2007, 8:12 AM)
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Jun 18, 2007, 8:12 AM
Post #5 of 5
(1027 views)
Re: [stacyalex35] Renewing vows after 6 years of marriage
[In reply to]
You can do whatever you like - there are not etiquette police. However, you have come to a site where wedding experts answer based on etiquette. What you are suggesting is not proper as per modern day etiquette. And, the rules of the forum state that only experts are to respond to posts since we are not dealing with opinions. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Renewing vows after 6 years of marriage
My husband doesn't really care too much, but I know that he had always wanted a wedding as well. We rushed the marriage for immigration reasons and because we are christian, so it is the right way to earn the right to live with one another if you want to be together. We plan to renew our vows, Feb 14th, 2009. By that time, we will have the money to afford the wedding we had always wanted. I will not have a big dress, but an informal wedding dress, my two daughters will be flower girls, and I will love to have my sister and best-friend to be attendants or bridesmaids. Is this o.k? Also, My husband wants his brother to be his best man? We want to enter the alter from to alternate sides and then walk down the aisle together. We also have a song picked out for the ceremony. And we plan on dancing together alone at the reception, as the first ones,and we have a song for that. We will also be giving out favors for our guests. How formal should the reception be and the food? Should there be any speeches?? Please let me know if these would be appropriate because we never had a wedding and I want to make this as close to the wedding I never had as possible.
