My fiance' assumes it is appropriate for guests to give money as a gift to cover their costs of the party (food/drinks). He says this is customary in New York. Well, I am from Texas and that is not customary and in very poor taste. He also assumes, that if we note in invitation, no gifts, that they will give money, which he was in hopes that would end of being enough to cover most of the costs for the reception. Again, I let him know it is not assumed that attendees will give money, nor are they expected to, especially for a 2nd wedding.
Through this post, can someone please clear this up for my Fiance'?
Frustrated in Texas
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Mar 23, 2007, 12:41 PM
Post #2 of 2
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Re: [SAR0326] 2nd Wedding Etiquette - SAR
[In reply to]
I am from NJ/NY and no, it is not customary to "cover the cost" of the dinner plate. If it were, how would the guest know what to give? By asking the host what they are paying for the party? Nonsense.
It is not proper to mention gifts at all in the invitation. So, host the reception you can afford to host with your own finances. This has little to do with this being a second wedding since gifts are typically given the second time around. We just don't tell the giver what sort of gift we want.
Tell your fiance what happens when he assumes. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
2nd Wedding Etiquette - SAR
