My daughter passed away in December 2003 at age 37, leaving two girls--now 13 yrs and 9 yrs of age.
My son in law is getting re-married November 25.
Is it proper for me to be invited to the shower and wedding?
I have five other daughters and they have all received invitations.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Oct 3, 2005, 9:58 AM
Post #2 of 3
(1257 views)
Re: [kmth47] Former mother in law at second wedding?
[In reply to]
Dear Former MIL,
I'm not sure if you mean that all of you received invitations or if your daughters did, but you didn't. So, I will answer both questions.
This is a personal decision. Some are uncomfortable with a remarriage. But, you and your other daughters are still family through your daughter's children. So, he may be trying to keep the family together if he has invited all of you.
If just your daughters were invited but not you, that is a bit strange. There may have been a mistake, unless he thinks that you will feel uncomfortable... only guessing.
If only your daughters were invited, perhaps one of them could talk to him to ask why. It could very well be a misunderstanding. If you have been invited and feel uncomfortable, perhaps you could talk to him about it.
(This post was
edited by Et.byRebecca on Oct 3, 2005, 10:28 AM)
yvonne"instep"
Social Worker, Stepmother, Certified Stepfamily Counsellor
Oct 5, 2005, 12:12 PM
Post #3 of 3
(1227 views)
Re: [kmth47] Former mother in law at second wedding?
[In reply to]
I believe you're saying that your daughters were invited and you were not. It seems a bit unusuaul because either the "other" family is invited, or not, meaning you would have been included in this case. Unless there are other reasons they may not have invited you such as has been previously speculated, that you might be too uncomfortable. The other reason I could imagine would be if you had some difficulty with the remarriage or the new woman in your son-in-law's life which is also not unusual, in which case it would be uncomfortable to have you there. You haven't stated that you are unsupportive of the wedding, but I'm just suggesting this would be another reason why they may have chosen not to invite you.
I agree with the advice that you've received already that perhaps one of your daughters can check into this because there may be a misunderstanding or an oversight and you want to clear this up before things go any further. Yvonne Kelly, MSW, RSW, Certified Stepfamily Counsellor and Coach, Co-Founder and Director of the Step and Blended Family Institute http://www.stepinstitute.ca
(This post was
edited by yvonne"instep" on Oct 5, 2005, 12:13 PM)
Former mother in law at second wedding?
