This is his second marriage and my first. I am in between a rock and a hard place, We started to plan for a big wedding with all the bells and whistles. He has now changed his mind and wants to run away and have a tiny marriage. He says it is because he has done it all before and doesn't want to "waste the money" I have tried so many times to express to him that I want a traditional wedding with all the works, But to stop the frustration I have agreed for a casual river wedding in Arizona. How do I mix the two so that we both get what we want from our special day?
RevSusanna
Interfaith Wedding Minister
May 9, 2005, 7:51 PM
Post #2 of 3
(1249 views)
Re: [jongwifie2] his second my first
[In reply to]
Ah, there are so many ways to compromise. Decide what has the most meaning for you. Is it the dress? Then wear the dress of your dreams. Is it the ceremony? Then customize the ceremony the way you want it. The setting may be casual, but the ceremony can be traditional and personal....music: boom box (inexpensive) or string quartet (check your local music school)), processional, formal clergy. You can decorate any white tiered cake with natural flowers and it transforms into a gorgeous wedding cake. You can carry wild flowers or make your own bouquet with the help of some silk or satin ribbon and a beautiful pin. Your guests can blow bubbles (inexpensive and perfect for out of doors) as your recess down the aisle. You can print your own invitations and programs with the help of a creative friend and a good computer. You can honor your cultural traditions. Do your research, read books, read this website....you will get lots of ideas. It will take some effort on your part, but it will be worth it. If you have the wedding early in the day, you can serve light fare. Offer your guests only wine, water and soda...and save money.
I have performed and attended hundreds of eddings. Some of my favorite ones, where not the fancy expensive affairs, they were the creative ones with heart. The ones where the bride and groom took great care that both major elements and minor details things reflected who they were.
Re: [jongwifie2] his second my first
[In reply to]
Well... A small wedding can be so much nicer and more special than a big formal one. What matters is where the hearts are. I suspect your fiancee already knows that what counts the most is your feelings for each other and the happily ever after part (which seldom is emphasized enough) A river wedding in Arizona sure does not sound like a tough thing to make wonderful...How about you two take a picnic to the site and discuss what sorts of things are important to both of you for the ceremony and playfully negotiate a Win Win situation. What a great way to start a life together. The Art of Living is sometimes in how well we compromise...With a little creative thinking and all the love you have you will make this a beautiful,memorable and very special day for all involved. Plan to look back in 20 years and agree that you had a wedding that suited you both perfectly...Enjoy this...It is the good stuff in life...lots of love and best wishes.... Sue of Hobart's Fine Florals http://www.hobartsfineflorals.com
his second my first
