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Bridesmaid wants to choose her own shoes

 

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hyperchord24




Post #1 of 3 (957 views)
     Bridesmaid wants to choose her own shoes  

My fiance and I have just picked out bridesmaids' dresses. We haven't decided on shoes. My sister (who is a bridesmaid) wanted to use this old pair of dyeable shoes that she has (she's very thrifty). She had asked my fiance for permission and when she politely said "I don't think I like that," my sister said "oh, it's okay. For my wedding, I let all the girls wear whatever shoes they wanted." She's not saving money by doing this. It cost her 30 bucks to dye them, but the shoes we would pick out wouldn't be too much more. Now, this will ruin the effect when they stand together and ruin pictures. I want to say something, but my fiance doesn't want to some off as a bridezilla or start a feud. What do I do?


(This post was edited by TWQadmin on Oct 11, 2007, 9:03 AM)

Weddings by Shayna
WEDDING CONSULTANT




Post #2 of 3 (944 views)
     Re: [hyperchord24] Bridesmaid wants to choose her own shoes [In reply to]  

You can either

a) buy her shoes for her if she'll wear them

b) choose a pair of shoes for all of the girls that costs less than dying the ones she has now (because a $60 or $90 pair or more really will cost her more than re-dying a pair for $30)

c) come to terms with the fact that it's an extremely small number of photos that you'll end up looking at where you will see all of the girls' shoes at the same time, and few people are going to look at them and say "Wow, look at the shoes on that bridesmaid". They'll be looking at the happy newlyweds and the beautiful, smiling faces.

Truthfully, when you're picking wedding battles, please think in terms of "is this fight worth jeopardizing my relationship with my family and friends after the wedding?" In the grand scheme of things, it really is just a pair of shoes.
Shayna Walker, Williamsburg Wedding Design
http://www.williamsburgweddingdesign.com

(This post was edited by TWQadmin on Jan 14, 2008, 11:56 AM)

Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT




Post #3 of 3 (944 views)
     Re: [hyperchord24] Bridesmaid wants to choose her own shoes [In reply to]  

Dear Hyperchord,

I'm probably the wrong person to answer this, because etiquette wise, it is not a problem for the ladies to wear their own shoes as long as they are in the same color and similar style. I honestly don't see a problem with all of your ladies wearing similar and not the exact same shoe.

The only time this is a problem is for the very formal wedding. If this is a formal event, then everyone dresses exactly the same. This would be your only 'power' card here.

Best wishes,
Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now



 
 


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