I am at my wits end and I do not know what to do. I was engaged on 8/2/06, and asked my 2 best friends of 15 years right away to be my bridesmaids. We are now 55 days (12/10/06) and they still have not purchased their dresses. My Maid of Honor has been shopping with me twice for my dress and once for theirs. My other bridesmaid has not been available at all. Finally three weeks ago I just went ahead and chose the dress ($99 so quite a bargain) and directed them as to where to go to try on and purchase. I also offered to purchase shoes for both ladies and shoes and dress for the flower girl (daughter of the bridesmaid). Still- they have not purchased the dresses. We are reaching critical timing here and I am not sure what to do. Also, the bridesmaid has declined invitations to all other showers b/c she and the maid of honor are throwing a lingerie shower. Help. Please. Should I just purchase the dresses and move forward? My fiance said he can help with the cost but it will come from our honeymoon spending money. Is it too late to politely ask someone to replace these ladies?
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
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Re: [gnicolecan] Bridesmaids STILL have not bought dresses
[In reply to]
Dear Bridesmaid Trouble,
It may be best to ask them if they want to be involved and then decide.
There shouldn't be more than 2 showers (work shower excluded). More than that and it appears very negative. They should attend the other shower, but don't have to give a gift at both. Perhaps they don't know what is expected of them.
Re: [gnicolecan] Bridesmaids STILL have not bought dresses
[In reply to]
Tell your bridesmaids that they need to go ahead and purchase the dresses in order to be fitted in time for the wedding. Let them know that continually delaying doing so may mean the dresses won't be ready and with an end result of neither being in the wedding.
As for replacing them, you choose them and they accepted. So you will need to just work through this. There is no 'polite' way to take away a role from a wedding participant in this instance. Not to mention you are less than two months from the wedding and it wouldn't be fair to them at this point, nor to anyone else who you would be selecting as a last minute ditch effort replacement.
No, you shouldn't just buy the dresses. It is normal to panic a little when your bridesmaids have not bought their dresses at this point. But I really do believe just reiterating the importance of purchasing the dresses and the reason why should do the trick.
Bridesmaids STILL have not bought dresses
