My daughter and her fiance have plans to marry in 09 BUT they need to be married late summer 08 for benefits of transfer for the groom otherwise there is a chance they will have to live in separate cites for three years. MY question is, how to handle the "wedding" that they want in 09 if they are legally married in 08? Can they have a civil ceremony in 08 and a religious on e in 09?? Can they have the big wedding with dress, bridesmaids etc that they want?? They are not planning to hide the fact they have married. We are in a state of confusion since we have started planning the wedding in 09 and have just found out they need to have the legal paper in 08 so that the groom can end up in the same city as the bride. HELP?
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edited by TWQadmin on Jul 7, 2008, 12:46 PM)
TWQadmin
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Jul 7, 2008, 12:46 PM
Post #2 of 3
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Re: 2nd ceremony same bride and groom??
[In reply to]
Please set a good example for your daughter and explain to her that she needs to make a choice to marry and reap the benefits or wait. There really is no having it both ways. Otherwise, you'll be guiding her to break laws or, at least, bend them. Plus, I don't think any clergy person, or any religion, would look kindly on planning in this manner. Typically convalidation ceremonies in the Catholic church (or blessing of the marriage in other churches) are done after the couple has been married, not realizing the marriage wouldn't be recognized or re-thinking their feelings on marrying in the church. (And then, these ceremonies are not done to appear like weddings.) That isn't the case with your daughter. She has all of the information and should make her decision based on what is most important to her. If this were my daughter, I would tell her she cannot have her cake and eat it too. So, she should move the wedding up and plan whatever she can as soon as possible or wait until later, abiding by all the implications that come along with her choice.
We all really need to help guide this generation away from the "have it all", "entitled" and "no responsibility" generation. Sorry, I'm sure you got more advice that you wanted. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jul 7, 2008, 1:42 PM
Post #3 of 3
(371 views)
Re: 2nd ceremony same bride and groom
[In reply to]
Very well put. Thank you. I couldn't agree more. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
2nd ceremony same bride and groom
