My mother is unable to attend my wedding, therefore I am having a close woman who has aided in raising me stand in as my mother. May she light the unity candle? And how do I explain why my own mother will not be standing at the front of the church participating as the MOB 'role'?
TWQadmin
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Oct 22, 2007, 10:27 AM
Post #2 of 7
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Re: [becomingMrs] No Mother to light the candle?
[In reply to]
In order to give the best answer, I think we'd need to know why your mother isn't attending. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
becomingMrs
Oct 22, 2007, 8:52 PM
Post #3 of 7
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Re: [TWQadmin] No Mother to light the candle?
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This is a very personal issue, and my mother may or may not attend the wedding but I do not want her to stand at the front of the Chapel and be the mother of the bride. I have a close woman who has pretty much raised me who deserves to stand up as my mother. But I know people are going to be asking questions and whispers will happen, and I don't know how to explain this to others. I'd like this woman to perform all MOB traditions including the lighting of the unity candle.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Oct 23, 2007, 10:16 AM
Post #4 of 7
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Re: [becomingMrs] No Mother to light the candle?
[In reply to]
It would be best to skip the candle. The candle lighting is a symbol of joining the two families. Your friend isn't your mother even if she is filling in for one. So, lighting the candle with her isn't really symbolic.
She could be seated as a special guest in your mother's place. This could be listed in your program. Where mother of the bride's name should be listed, you could state that she is unable to attend. Then create another category for special guests. List your friend's name here and state that she will be seated as mother of the bride. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
(This post was
edited by Etiquette Now on Oct 23, 2007, 1:42 PM)
becomingMrs
Oct 23, 2007, 12:30 PM
Post #5 of 7
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Re: [Etiquette Now] No Mother to light the candle?
[In reply to]
My fiance would really like to have the unity candle, is it possible to have another family member light it from each side? Such as siblings?
TWQadmin
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Oct 23, 2007, 1:01 PM
Post #6 of 7
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Re: [becomingMrs] No Mother to light the candle?
[In reply to]
Doing this will actually highlight your mother's absence. If she attends and isn't inolved it will be embarrassing for both of you. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Oct 23, 2007, 1:45 PM
Post #7 of 7
(656 views)
Re: [becomingMrs] No Mother to light the candle?
[In reply to]
I completely agree. Unfortunately, this is one of those "You can't have it all" moments. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
No Mother to light the candle?
