My partner is Italian with a large family and mine is tiny. We want a small intimate ceremony with just parents and siblings attending and our 100+ guests come to the reception in the afternoon. My dad is very upset that my only aunt and uncle can't attend the ceremony and thinks that I will be crushing them. I know it will break their hearts but if I compromise with this my partners family will be upset and want to invite other too. Where do I draw the line, is it wrong not to include my poor aunt? I am torn! What is the right thing to do?
Normally, if no aunts and uncles are invited from one side, then no aunts and uncles are invited on the other. Having said that, there may be a third option. Given that your family is so very "tiny" maybe his parents would understand. Tell them that since your family is so small, it is almost as if you are one immediate family...and you would like to make this one exception.
Discuss this with your future husband. He may know how to navigate his family. If he feels that his parents will not be understanding, then you may have no choice but to stick to your guns. Then, perhaps you can write your aunt and uncle a heartfelt letter (or call them on the telephone) telling them how torn you feel and why you have come to the decision you have.
Ah....these family issues are not easy....but with love, communication and patience.....workable....
intimate ceremony ettiquite
