I have been invited to a wedding that is scheduled for July 3rd, which is a Tuesday evening and not mention the day before a major holiday. The person who invited us is a friend, but to be more accurate, she is more of an acquaintance than a friend. I attended her bridal shower (also held on a major holiday weekend, Memorial Day) and gave her a rather generous gift. We just received her invitation and a response is due by June 15th. My question is, would it be horrible if we did not attend her wedding? The fact of the matter is that me and my fiance both work on that Tuesday and being that the wedding is going to be held a day before the 4th of July and it is about an hour away from where we live, we feel like it is more of a hassle than anything... also, it is really not in our budget to attend due to our upcoming nuptials.
Some of our considerations whether or not to attend are: 1. I am getting married in September and she is on my guest list 2. I don't want to make her feel like all of the sudden I am not concerned about her special day and 3. I don't want to jeapardize the nice relationship we have, even though we are not tight friends 4. I did attend her bridal shower and quite frankly cannot come up with a good enough excuse to back out at this point 5. another main reason is, I am on a tight budget since I am planning and paying for my own wedding coming up in less than three months and giving her a wedding gift is not something we considered. I am not sure what's the right thing to do. Please shine some light on this situation.... thanks!
You are not obligated to attend, no matter what. In fact, she will probably have a number of guests declining based on the fact that it will be held during the week and directly before a holiday.
You are also not obligated to give a gift if you do not attend. There is only one etiquette specialist I know of that still insists that those who receive an invitation are obligated to give and that person is not me.
For future reference, the shower gift shouldn't be expected to be expensive.
Holiday wedding
