I got engaged (as I said in another post) 2 weeks ago. The day after our engagement, we called all our relatives and a few close friends to announce our engagement to them. At this point in time we had not decided upon a date, though we did have it narrowed down to three possible weekends.
I have a friend who recently moved out of town. She was one of the friends we called. This past week, I received a card in the mail from her. It was a congratulatory note on our engagement. In it, she stated how much she was looking forward to the wedding.
Here is the problem. Due to the size of our extended families and budgetary limitations, we have had to cut our list down significantly. Co-workers got knocked off the list first, followed by friends (beginning with those whom we felt would be unlikely or unable to make it). She was among the first taken off our list. (Please note, no invitations have been sent out yet. The wedding isn't until August)
As it stands, we have 121 guests in a hall that only holds 120. We have two lists. Our MUST invite list (consisting of family) and our "Really Really Want to" invite list (where she currently is).
How do I handle this?
Additionally, I have other friends who have informed me that they cannot wait. These friends simply are not on the list.
Even my very best friend is not on my list. When she told me that she expects an invitation, I explained the situation fully to her (Hall, 120 people, 121 on the list, family only, that sort of thing). I told her that I truly wanted to invite her, but that non-family members will not be getting invitations until family members begin to send their regrets.
She told me she understood, she said that of course family must come first, but then later restated that she "Expects" an invitation.
I feel very awkward. Do I keep telling my friends that the size of the hall forbids me from inviting most of the people I would like to?
(This post was
edited by Mousie on Jan 14, 2005, 11:38 AM)
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jan 14, 2005, 2:26 PM
Post #2 of 2
(1299 views)
Re: [Mousie] "I expect an invitation"
[In reply to]
Dear Mousie,
This happens all of the time. You have so many who have to attend and those you wish could. Unfortunately, you are correct. You will just have to tell your friends that you wish they could attend, but that you don't have room.
Perhaps you could have a video and popcorn night with your friends. Play the video of your wedding, eat popcorn, and enjoy the company.
"I expect an invitation"
