Hello, My fiance and I moved from Chicago to central Illinois (3 hours outside of Chicago) for college. We now live in Central Illinois and would like to get married there. Both our families however live in Chicago and they do not feel its fair to hold our wedding so far away, despite the fact that its where we live. A few people have told us its a "destination wedding" and that we shouldn't expect many people or gifts. Is this the case? Is a central IL wedding a destination wedding? Is it fair to ask guests to drive 4 hours?
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Re: Is it a destination wedding? Is it fair?
[In reply to]
Dear Nschille,
This is not a destination wedding. It is a typical wedding where many of your guests will have to travel to attend. It is very common. But, family members are correct that many may not be able to travel to attend. That doesn't make your plans unfair as long as you aren't pressuring people to attend.
We should never expect gifts, so your current plans should have nothing to do with receiving them. Also, our gifts shouldn't reflect how much we had to travel to attend the wedding. That is just plain silly.
Re: Is it a destination wedding? Is it fair?
[In reply to]
I agree with Rebecca - this is not a destination wedding. Although, I can understand why your parents might be upset. In past generations, the weddings were usually to take place at the church of the bride in her hometown. Now, with families spread out and parents not hosting weddings, there is less of that tradition. Speak to your parents about why you are hosting your wedding in the place you selected, assuming, of course, that you and your fiance are paying for the wedding. If your parent's are paying, you may not want to look a gift horse in the mouth.
Gifts are usually given for wedding, the location of the wedding or necessity of travel shouldn't have anything to do with a gift. Wedding guests should choose to give what they feel reflects their relationship with the couple (and is within the guest's budget) and has little to do with what they have to spend to get to the wedding or the cost of the wedding meal. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Is it a destination wedding? Is it fair?
