My daughter is getting married in a few months. Her new in-laws to be are paying for everything as they are wealthy and what I could afford would not be good enough for my daughter or her fiance's family. This has really strained our relationship to begin with. I have been left out of all the planning procedures from the very beginning. I have been divorced for several years and am beginning to date again. I do not get along with her father or his wife (my ex-best friend). I do not want to go to the wedding, or to the reception, without a male friend to escort me so I won't have to sit alone. It is not like he will be escorting me down the aisle. My daughter swears if I bring a date she will seat me with everyone else and not at the front table with family. I think my date/escort should be seated where I am as MOB. Should I be able to expect to have an escort or am I expected to sit there at the wedding and reception with no one by my side and alone like a wallflower? I'm not sure what should be done or if I should just respect my daughter's wishes and be the only one there with no one at their side at a formal occasion. Please help me decide what to do. I will also mention that my daughter has angered several family members, some of whom are in the wedding party to the point they are threatening not to come and ditch her at the last minute. It has been me up to this point to calm them.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Feb 10, 2008, 9:57 AM)
Weddings by Shayna
WEDDING CONSULTANT
Post #2 of 5
(992 views)
Re: [sweetsuzyq] Mother of the bride escort seating
[In reply to]
While your daughter is not obligated to allow you to bring an escort, it would be considerate. But perhaps you should speak to her again in more depth. Is it the person you have chosen to escort you who she does not like? Are you indeed the only guest of the entire wedding who will be there unescorted?
If your daughter is singling you out arbitrarily to attend unescorted, then there might be complexities to your relationship that are impacting the wedding. If the problem goes deeper than just wedding logistics, you need to figure out how to most effectively come to terms with the issues and let them least impact the wedding day.
You can't force your daughter to invite an escort for you, but you may be able to overcome the issue that has led her to the decision.
Re: [sweetsuzyq] Mother of the bride escort seating
[In reply to]
Great advice and I completely agree. Your relationship is the most important part of this equation. And, per etiquette standards, she is only obligated to invite significant others of her guests. You are not in a relationship and have no significant other. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Post #4 of 5
(985 views)
Re: [sweetsuzyq] Mother of the bride escort seating
[In reply to]
Agreed. But, are there no other relatives from your side of the family invited with whom you can be seated? Must you have an escort? If so, is the reason really just for company or is it something more? Is forcing the escort issue more important that keeping your relationship with your daughter calm? These are questions to consider before moving on. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Feb 10, 2008, 3:59 PM)
sweetsuzyq
Post #5 of 5
(981 views)
Re: [TWQadmin] Mother of the bride escort seating
[In reply to]
I raised my daughter to be kind and considerate, but since her involvement with an extremely wealthy family(they rented an entire island resort just for their family vacation in Alaska, est. value, half a mil)she has become very materialistic and quite frankly treats me as an afterthought and that I am not good enough for her or his family. If she needs a mother she turns to the MOG. Our relationship is strained already. First, she neglects to send me an engagement announcement, although everyone else got one, her reply "oh, she has one floating in her car she could give me" On the wedding invitations, I am listed as Mrs. which I find insulting. Then in the paper, her step mom is listed before me as a parent by name. I raised her and had sole custody of her for her entire life. I only wanted to bring an escort so that I can endure what seems to be more of a strain than anything. I want to be happy for her, this should be a happy occasion. But she is not the person who was happy and content her whole life when I had her. Now its all about money, if you don't have it, which I don't, then you are nobody, which apparently I am to her at this time. I am mother in name only to her. She told me her fiance's sister is giving her a bridal shower. I found out on the invite it is hosted by MOG, sister of the groom, and his grandmother. She is treating her older brother badly that he is telling me he wants nothing to do with it and is threatening to not show. Her sister who is a bridesmaid and is a few months shy of 21 is the only one not invited and forbidden to come to the bachelorette party, because they are flying everyone to Vegas for it. Reasoning is that she is not 21 yet, but she doesn't drink anyway. I will probably not bring an escort or anyone for that matter as I had wanted. I will endure this alone. I am just tired of not having the respect I should deserve in this wedding just like the rest of her family is not being respected. Thank you very much for helping me decide that issue. I wish you could help with all the rest of it.
Mother of the bride escort seating
