My fiance and I are recently engaged. We are in our 30's and I have been married before, he has not. My first was a simple Justice of the Peace wedding with only 7 people attending the whole thing. (Family did not approve)
We want to plan a wedding, but we have a tight budget. How can I tactfully ask our parents if they would consider a contribution, without sounding like I am asking for a handout. Everything I am reading is suggesting setting a budget as priority number one. I want to do things properly this time around!!
We would be happy with any contributions; whether it is advise or monetary is not the issue. Class and tact is more the issue as I want to avoid over-stepping, as to not piss off anyone!!
Because parents are no longer financially responsible and especially since this is your second marriage, it is best to wait until parents offer to contribute and assume that you are paying for this on your own. Asking them would imply that you expect them to contribute and would be putting them in a difficult position.
I agree about possibly putting them in an awkward position, I just don't want them to feel offended if I don't ask either. I will wait for an offer and assume that we are on our own until then.
You could ask if they would like to participate in the planning and see if that may open up some dialogue. The only time I could see a parent being insulted would be if they weren't asked to participate. I'd be pleased as punch not to be asked to shell out any more money to my kids. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".