Background: My fiancee's mother passed away 5 years ago. He is 33 years old and his father has been engaged for 4 years. His dad's fiancee's son is one of the groomsmen. We are trying to avoid any hurt feeling. At our ceremony we are lighting a unity candle. Tradition states that the mothers would light the single candles representing both families. The unity candle represents and encompasses our parents and the way we were raised. If I have any one other than my mother light the candle she would be offended. She feels it is poor judgement to have My fiancee's father light his candle and my parents light mine. My mom feels that we are leaving My Fiancee's Dads Fiancee out and making it obvious that my fiancee does not feel like she is a parent to him. What should I do. We are already bringing her up in the ceremony for a hawaiin lei tradition for the parents. Please help
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Aug 20, 2004, 6:57 AM
Post #2 of 2
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Re: [cdunn03] Role of Fiancee's Fathers Fiancee
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This actually happened to me at my own nephew's wedding. My sister is deceased and he had his step mother light the candle. This really highlighted my sister's abscence. My dad was really hurt as was the rest of our family and friends.
I would leave the unity candle out. It is not an integral part of the wedding ceremony. If you absolutely can't leave it out have just the bride and groom light the unity candle. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Role of Fiancee's Fathers Fiancee
