I have noticed many posts wondering who is responsible to pay for what, and the hard feelings that have resulted when someone's expectation was not met.
Here is what my husband and I have told our children: When you decide to get married, we will give you $X toward your wedding. You may use it toward a wedding; you may elope and use it toward a home; whatever. The point is that we will give $X - no more, no less. If you choose to have a ceremony and reception that costs more than that, you will need to come up with the difference. This monetary gift is NOT 'on top' of anything, e.g. rehearsel dinner, bridal gown, etc. etc. It is what we will give - period. How you choose to spend it will be up to you.
Telling our kids this up front - long before they are even engaged - has made everyone's life much easier, and no hard feelings.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jan 15, 2007, 8:39 PM
Post #2 of 2
(1053 views)
Re: [moosie] Suggestion for 'who pays' in a modern world
[In reply to]
Dear Moosie,
Bravo and thank you for sharing. This is very helpful and responsible. Our children have so many more opportunities than many of us had in our youth and helping realize this and helping them become more responsible for their future is part of being the parent we all really want to be.
In my opinion, you are doing a very good job. Thank you!
Suggestion for 'who pays' in a modern world
