Hi there everyone !! PLEASE be patient w/ me as this is my FIRST time/visit to this nice site ! I am a 29 year-old w/ a bit of a "sticky" question for everyone about Bridal Etiquette. My wedding is scheduled for this coming Fall early in November in the Providence, RI area, and my whole life, I have been told by a WONDERFUL and UNDERSTANDING mom that a girl's wedding is HERS to design, and other than silly or malicious ideas, nothing is more important than creating a BEAUTIFUL experience for myself, my family and my guests ! My closest friend since Age 2 is my current room-mate Heather, and for all the years we have been together, although it has been a constant wish in BOTH our earlier lives, neither of us has ever had the chance to be a flower girl @ a REAL wedding. We have talked many long hours about this, giggling and smiling in our dreams about the joy and innocent beauty of this important part of a little girl's life. Nothing is more important than being there for a TRUE FRIEND like Heather, and I would like to make her wish come true by giving her (and myself) ... the incredible joy of being the flower girl @ MY wedding ! My mom thinks it is just one of the most beautiful and memorable things she has EVER heard of, but my soon-to-be MIL has expressed some VERY negative thoughts about the picture and memory this would leave for "her little boy" <giggles> ... My future partner (tho very quietly ONLY to me) has indicated that he thinks it is just a beautiful and wholly wonderful and thoughtful idea. IS THIS MY RIGHT AND DECISION TO MAKE regardless of "normal convention" ?? My "new mom" is genuinely a very nice person and is jut looking out for things I understand ... but doing this for Heather is INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT to me ! What should I do ? -- I would never want to hurt or embaress anyone.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jan 18, 2005, 11:14 AM
Post #2 of 2
(1444 views)
Re: [Katie Marie] Unusual request from the Bride ! ... <giggles>
[In reply to]
Dear Giggles,
You say that Heather is very important to you and that you would never want to hurt or embarrass anyone. So, if you were to have a grown woman as your flower girl, some just may laugh. There is no 'rule' against it. It is just one of those expectations that the flower girl will be of a certain age.
Rules and traditions are changing daily, because of our life styles. We can now have a man as a MOH and no one thinks twice. But, how did the guests of the first wedding where a man stood for the bride react? Do you want to be one of the first to have your best friend as a flower girl and subject her to possible ridicule?
This is your choice and perhaps everyone will react positively. But, the fact that your future MIL did not, portends that perhaps some will join her. For warned....
Unusual request from the Bride ! ... <giggles>
