My son got married in October 04 and his wife filed for a divorce in November 04. There were no thank you sent out to the guests and I think they should be done soon. She is not going to do it, so I need to help my son with this. How do we word the thank you notes even though the wedding is in the toilet? What would be the proper way to say thank you even though it didn't last?
I am so sorry to hear about your son's situation. According to etiquette, if the marriage took place (no matter how long it lasted), the couple may keep the gifts. If the gifts are kept, they must be acknowledged with thank you notes. Something along the lines of: Dear Aunt Sue and Uncle Charlie, It was so wonderful to see you last month. And thank you for the fabulous sterling silver cake server. I truly appreciate your love and support at this time ~ Danny.
I do want you to remember that etiquette is all about guidelines. Although the gifts may be kept, he may want to consider returning the gifts to the senders. The reason being, who wants a bunch of wedding gift around to remind him the wedding did not work as planned. Additionally, should your son decide to marry again in the next few years, the guests will not feel as it they are sending a second round of gifts.
I realize this is not an easy time and I am gladdened to read that you are there for, and supporting, your son.
Thank you for your time and response. What we are looking for isn't along those lines. Everyone that came to the wedding knows about the seperation/pending divorce. We are looking for the right way to say thank you/we regret, knowing that they already know the situation.
I think the suggestion Jodi gave in her post is a good one:
"Dear Aunt Sue and Uncle Charlie, It was so wonderful to see you last month. And thank you for the fabulous sterling silver cake server. I truly appreciate your love and support at this time ~ Danny."
It implies that everyone is aware of the situation without it being blaring and negative. You could add the word "difficult" before the word time if you want.
Unless of course you are going to be returning the gifts; then obviously no thank you note is needed. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Wedding gone bad, thank you notes
There were no thank you sent out to the guests and I think they should be done soon. She is not going to do it, so I need to help my son with this. How do we word the thank you notes even though the wedding is in the toilet? What would be the proper way to say thank you even though it didn't last? 
