My stepson (who lived with his father and me since age 8) and his fiancee have asked us to host a "night before the wedding" get together to meet her parents (the wedding is very small and there will be no actual rehearsal). They do not want this at a restaurant but rather an outdoor barbeque affair at a local campground. The minister & his wife have been invited and the MOG as well. Although I am quite willing to be pleasant for my stepson's sake (I adore him and would do just about anything he asked), MOG does not like me at all. My husband and I are quite happy to do this, I don't mind the cooking (it's only 9 people, no biggie), I'm just so worried about things being uncomfortable. Although the wedding is to be parents only, I am invited and will be seated with my husband (a fact MOG has already expressed some displeasure about). What am I to do??? I just want everybody to get along for a short time. P.S. Yes, I am the same person who's father is getting married on a different post...Yikes! What a summer!
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Mar 26, 2007, 6:12 PM
Post #2 of 5
(494 views)
Re: [gkephart] dinner with step & mom
[In reply to]
Dear Gkephart,
This is a very busy year for you.
You should be seated with your husband in the front row, with her in the third. That really shouldn't be an issue. But, exes can be a bit touchy about these things.
If you don't want to invite his biological mother, you don't really have to as this isn't a traditional rehearsal dinner. But, it would be best if you did, just for appearances sake. I suppose this is just one of those smile and grit your teeth while staying three arms length from her situations. Maybe she won't even attend.
Re: [Et.byRebecca] dinner with step & mom
[In reply to]
Lovely thought, but I'm afraid MOG would hit the roof if I was seated in front of her. Besides, since there will only be 5 guests at the wedding (4 bio-parents & little ol' me) we are all going to be seated in the front row on the two sides. There is no doubt in my mind that MOG should be (and has been and agreed to come weeks ago, now is pitching the fit) invited to our little pre-wedding get together. I guess my question is more...what should my response be to unkind remarks in this situation? My teeth are ground to nubbins already! And she will come, believe me...out of spite if nothing else.
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Mar 26, 2007, 6:39 PM
Post #4 of 5
(488 views)
Re: [gkephart] dinner with step & mom
[In reply to]
Sounds like anyone attending will know all about this woman so my advice is to just smile and say thank you so she can't possibly have a retort. Then, after she's gone scream into a pillow. Avoid alcoholic beverages, no matter how inticing it might be to have a cushion. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Mar 26, 2007, 7:44 PM
Post #5 of 5
(483 views)
Re: [gkephart] dinner with step & mom
[In reply to]
I couldn't agree more. Take away all of her weapons. If you smile and walk away, only she appears petty.
I feel for you though. I definitely wouldn't want to be in your position . Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
dinner with step & mom
Avoid alcoholic beverages, no matter how inticing it might be to have a cushion. 
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