I'm not sure which forum to post this question. I understand that the bride and groom usually give their parents a gift for their participation in the wedding. What type of gift is usually given? My fiance's parents have not taken part in ANY of the wedding preparations. In fact, they do not even ask how things are going. My mother is somewhat disabled (severe arthritis) and has not helped with any of the planning either. She did put money aside for me when I was growing up (so technically this is my money) but will not be able to contribute anything additional (she survives on Social Security and a very small pension from my deceased father). My fiance and I have agreeded to purchase Mothers Albums from the Photographer. Could this be considered a suitable gift? Technically I would rather not give his parents anything since (a) I don't think they like me anyway and (b) they have not participated in any of the planning. My mom would probably participate more, however her disability limits what she can do. Could I have someone's opinion? Thank you.....
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
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Feb 21, 2006, 2:39 PM
Post #2 of 7
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Re: [killerbee1970] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
Please don't give gifts based on what others can/would do for you. We should give gifts to show others have we feel or to show appreciation. If you or your fiance feel that you would like to give a gift to either of your parent's then do so. Otherwise, gifts should never be expected or obligatory. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
expertplanner
BRIDAL CONSULTANT
Feb 21, 2006, 3:41 PM
Post #3 of 7
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Re: [killerbee1970] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
I agree. Gifts should never be given based on what others did do/might do for us. They should always be from the heart. Rhonda Allen, Bridal Consultant New Beginnings Weddings
Nancy Tucker
PRESIDENT - WEDDINGS BEAUTIFUL
Feb 21, 2006, 5:17 PM
Post #4 of 7
(1378 views)
Re: [killerbee1970] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
Dear Killerbee1970, I totally agree with the experts but I think the parents albums is a very nice gift. Nancy Tucker President of Weddings Beautiful US http://www.weddingsbeautiful.com
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
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Feb 21, 2006, 5:25 PM
Post #5 of 7
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Re: [killerbee1970] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
Yes, sorry, I think that the albums are a fine gift too. Also, you haven't mentioned what your groom says or if you've discussed it but maybe he has some strong feelings about his parents and the gift he may want to give them on your wedding day.
You say you don't think they like you - well - how does the old saying go? You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar? So - be really sweet to them and rather than being a killer bee, maybe sweeten them up with a little of your honey?? Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
killerbee1970
Feb 22, 2006, 8:38 AM
Post #6 of 7
(1360 views)
Re: [TWQadmin] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
Hi TWQ Admin.
I have been extremely patient, pleasant, and civil to his mother for the past 8 years and I'm tired of bending over backwards to please her. She doesn't like me because (a) I am 5 years older than her (step) son, (b) I am american and they are from Iran, (c) I am Catholic and he is Muslim (she is very religious), (d) I am Walmart while she is Rodeo Drive, (e) we moved in together after 6 months of dating, (f) I was his first and only girlfriend.
I will remain Civil to her, but as I mentioned, I am not going to bend over backwards to please her. His father really doesn't say anything, but in reality he can't because his first wife; my fiance's mother was an American he met while attending college in the US. She passed away when he was 5 of Breast Cancer.
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Feb 22, 2006, 9:26 AM
Post #7 of 7
(1355 views)
Re: [killerbee1970] Gifts for the Mothers
[In reply to]
Sometimes it's important to have more details. But, I still think it's a good idea to always do what you know, in your heart, is the right thing to do - even if the other person doesn't.
Still - talk to your groom and make the decison together. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Gifts for the Mothers
