My wife and I just got married. We did not receive any gifts or even a card from my immediate Family. Mother, brother, or Sister did give nothing. My sister is 26 and brother 21. They feel they have up to 3 months to give a gift, however we feel it is very tacky for the immediate family to not give anything during the rehearsal dinner or the wedding. I feel it is even tackier because my wife and I gave them all gifts at the rehearsal dinner and they did not even do anything or participate in the wedding. Money would not be an issue for my mother; however she just put my brother’s birthday before our wedding and spent $1,400 on a bike for his birthday. Normally we all get about $200 gifts for our b-days. Our wedding was planned 1 year in advance. Plenty of time to plan on gifts. What do you think about my mother’s priorities? Just so you know she is a nurse that works 4 days a month. She does not make much. Only about 40k a year. I just want to put all in perspective. I just can't believe she put my brothers birthday in front of her oldest son’s once in a lifetime wedding. And spent three times as much on my brother’s birthday as she would probably spend on our wedding. My Father passed away about six months ago (they have been divorced for 15 years) and had very good etiquette. I can see him rolling over in his grave. What do you think, and when should the immediate family give a gift.
Yes, any guest who attends a wedding should send a gift to the couple before or directly after the wedding. They shouldn't take it to the wedding, rehearsal dinner, or reception. But, this isn't what your family believes. And, we shouldn't expect gifts or really count who gave and who didn't. If your mother contributed to your wedding, she may consider that your gift.
No one besides your brother should know how much his birthday gift costs. It really shouldn't be a part of this equation.
It is best to focus on your marriage now and not on the few gifts you didn't receive.
gift etiquette
