My mother (MOB) became very upset when she learned that the gifts of those who are unable to attend the wedding will be sent to his parents house. We did this because they live closer to him and we can transport the gifts much easier that way, and also because they have more room for the packages. My parents live about 5 hours from me, and his parents live 30 minutes from him. I see him about once every 2 weeks. At the time, we didn't think that it would be such a big deal. She said that I should know that the gifts are usually sent to the bride's parents house. When I tried to explain, she said that I was wrong. I am guessing that she is just hurt, and maybe feels excluded.
I would send the gifts to my house, except that I am moving very shortly and don't want to run the risk of losing a gift in transit. Any advice is appreciated.
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
May 8, 2007, 10:55 AM
Post #2 of 2
(589 views)
Re: [Adogg] where to send gifts if invited can't attend
[In reply to]
Dear Adogg,
It is very generous of people to send you gifts when they are not attending. This is not an obligation. So, please remember this when writing the thank you notes.
Your mother is correct when considering traditional etiquette rules. But, weddings are more about the couple now and parents really aren't the planners or financially responsible. So, the gifts are usually shipped to the couple's home these days. Asking to have them shipped anywhere else is your choice. She is probably, as you say, just hurt and feeling out of the loop. It may be time for chocolate and some private time with mom.
where to send gifts if invited can't attend
