My sister's husband is an alcoholic and racist. He was thrown out of her best friend's wedding for causing a scene and my sister was maid of honor. I am having my sister as my maid of honor and have mentioned to her that I'm not sure if I want him there. Even if he were invited, I do not think he would attend, because it is 8 hours away. But, I do not want to take any chances. Is it okay to not invite him? Do I address the invitation to her and the kids, or address it to all and verbally tell her I'd rather he didn't attend? I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I also don't want my guests to be uncomfortable.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Dec 30, 2008, 8:32 AM)
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
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Re: Alcoholic relative not invited to wedding
[In reply to]
Dear Minkat,
This is one of the few situations where we don't follow the rule of inviting the significant other. When someone is abusive in nature, in his case substance and verbal abuse, we can exclude him and still be viewed as proper.
Address the invitation to only those invited. Don't include his name or he is invited.
It may be best to discuss this with her as soon as possible. This is one of the issues that could cause her to step down and really should have been "disclosed" when you asked her to stand with you. You have his past escapades to help explain why he is not welcome.
Alcoholic relative not invited to wedding
