Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
I am the mother of the groom. The couple was married June 1 in a destination wedding. The bride's parents are hosting a "celebration" party in a couple of weeks. The invitations only listed the parents of the bride as host but the bride's parents are telling me I pay for the grooms cake at this celebration. I figured if they were hosting it they paid for everything. I helped with the reception after the wedding by cooking casseroles that were served. I did give a list of my people to invite but gave money to help with invitation and postage expense.
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Jun 9, 2008, 3:26 PM)
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jun 9, 2008, 5:27 PM
Post #2 of 7
(464 views)
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
Dear Fortysom,
If they are hosts, they pay. It appears that they don't realize this. It may be best to have a calm discussion about it.
The groom's cake is optional. Perhaps it is something that can be eliminated. In fact, all cake is optional. Often this party doesn't include any traditional wedding reception elements.
We shouldn't assume that anyone is financially responsible for any wedding costs except the couple. Hopefully the couple can relay this to her parents.
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
Thanks for your help. I felt like this was the case but wanted to make sure. I am not out to cause trouble by any means that is the last thing I want but I have way exceeded by groom's budget with this being a destination wedding and it had to end somewhere. I think not having the groom's cake would be the best option and I know it wouldn't matter to my son if there wasn't one and I relayed this to the parents of the bride.
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Jun 10, 2008, 9:34 AM
Post #4 of 7
(451 views)
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
To cause the least amount of friction, allow your son and his bride to speak to her parents (or the bride alone if you think that would be better received).
Let us know how it all turns out. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
fortysom
Jun 10, 2008, 10:45 AM
Post #5 of 7
(447 views)
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
I have already emailed the mother of the bride. I think she and I can resolve it better than the bride and I can. I just told her after looking into this more I have found with she and her husband hosting it that released us from any financial responsibility. I have not heard back but I am not worried about problems. I will help with any work I need to do in getting ready for this. I will let you know what happens.
fortysom
Jun 12, 2008, 9:53 AM
Post #6 of 7
(415 views)
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
I am very sorry to say this did not go well as I had thought it would. I thought we could solve it without involving the bride and groom since we have been the ones paying for everything. I have not discussed it with my son because he doesn't need to feel caught between me and his bride - I don't want him to feel he has to take sides because I didn't see this as a battle. Thanks for your help in this matter. You live and learn. I like your advice about writing sorrows in the sand and this is what I will do with this.
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Jun 12, 2008, 12:03 PM
Post #7 of 7
(410 views)
Re: Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
[In reply to]
Yes, I sort of expected it would be better for the couple to speak to the bride's parents. It allows them to be the bad guys as letting the parents know the ideas are coming from them as a couple, who are the people who should be in charge of making the wedding plans and not the parents.
Although you can certainly write this sorrow in your sand, you cannot be sure the bride's parents will, so ask your son and his bride to smooth things over for you and then allow them to plan for here on out. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
Only bride's parents names on reception invitation
