I have a pretty ODD question. My parents are separated and my mother now lives with her boyfriend whom my youngest sister has pretty much grown up with for most of her life. My father though is still alive and well and she and my dad don't have a relationship at all. She is getting married soon and has sent out her invitation saying that she and her fiance have received the blessing of their parents: and here she states my mother's name AND my mother's boyfriend instead of her biological father. Because I am close to my father, I feel slighted, to say the least, and would like to know if there was a proper way to address both my father and my mother's boyfriend in the invitation. Any thoughts?
If the invitations have already gone out, seems like the deal is done. I don't see the point in getting the appropriate wording, but, it's your sister's wedding. All you can do is to help support your dad and perhaps offer suggestions to your sister for including her father, if she likes. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
yvonne"instep"
Social Worker, Stepmother, Certified Stepfamily Counsellor
I completely agree. If it's done already, there isn't much that can be done about it. It's obvious that your sister does think of her stepdad as her father. While that may not sit well with you, that's the way she sees it. If you're close to her perhaps you can talk with her and encourage her to include her biological father (your father) in the wedding in some way. There is always more to any story so maybe there are reasons she has chosen to do it this way and again, remind yourself that this is her choice, not yours, so you're not responsible and cannot fix it. You can support your Dad, and recommend things to your sister. A little word of caution though, if you are upset with her and you start the conversation with criticism about her choosing to do it this way, you will really reduce your chances of her listening to anything else you have to offer.
Best of luck and remember when it's your wedding, you get to do it however you want and include everyone if you so choose. Yvonne Kelly, MSW, RSW, Certified Stepfamily Counsellor and Coach, Co-Founder and Director of the Step and Blended Family Institute http://www.stepinstitute.ca
Thanks for the responses. Yes, the wedding invitations have been sent out. However, just as an fyi (for me), is there a proper way to word the invitation under such a circumstance?
Yes, there is, but it is your sister's decision of who to list as her parents. Her father could have been mentioned under her name as: also the daughter of... . Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
Wording wedding invitations
