name order on wedding invitations when groom's family is paying more
Due to financial constraints on the part of my parents, my fiance's family is putting in considerably more money for our wedding than mine is (my dad was able to cover my dress and the invitations but my fiance's parents are picking up pretty much everything else) and I am slightly embarrassed by this. However, my fiance's family is also physically hosting the reception at their house, so there is no doubt in my mind that they are the hosts of this event; they've worked very hard on this wedding, providing both money and a great deal of their time, and I absolutely want to acknowledge that in the invitations (I also have a great relationship with them both and don't want to jeopardize that.) As far as I can tell, all of this indicates that the invitations should read something to the effect of:
(Groom's parents) invite you to the wedding of their son ____ to (me), daughter of (my parents).
My problem is that I'm a pretty traditional kind of person and it seems very strange to me to have the groom's name first on the invitation. Is there any way that I can word things to have my name first while still acknowledging that his parents are hosting (and hopefully while still having my parents' names on the invitation somewhere)? Or is that just hopelessly and unnecessarily complicated and should I just leave the invites as above?
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Feb 16, 2009, 12:16 PM)
Etiquette Now
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Re: name order on wedding invitations when groom's family is paying more
[In reply to]
Dear Cwburg,
Since parents are no longer financially responsible for their children's weddings, it would be logical to list you two are hosts now. But, that isn't the case yet. Wedding invitations are still very traditional, especially when it is a formal wedding. For the informal wedding, the wording can be informal as well. So, you have more wiggle room. But, it seems that you could list both sets of parents at the top with his parents listed first and eliminate the words "their son". I would speak to his parents first and get their take on it. If they are very traditional or seem to feel hurt, it would be best to stick to the first plan.
Please do not feel embarrassed by your parents lack of funding toward your wedding. Your wedding really should be paid for by you two. So, it was very generous for them to pay for anything.
name order on wedding invitations when groom's family is paying more
