My daughter and her boyfriend of 8 years were engaged this spring and they were going to get married next summer in an outdoor wedding near the river, something they both enjoy kayaking.
The grooms brother just found out a week ago that he is going back to Irag in April, so this poses the question that they are struggling with.
Having a very small, immediate family(parents, siblings, grandparents) wedding this summer with the brother and doing a reception next summer? Would this be totally too long? Seems so rushed to plan everything so fast to do it yet this fall. Also bride has two first cousins getting married, one in August, one in September, both of which have been engaged for 15 plus months. Would it be inappropriate to do October and do it all and risk the "outside" thing they want? Would they be best to compromise and have the wedding during J-term (3 weeks off from college in January) Do another winter month right before April? They didn't want to do winter, but could do a snowflake theme etc, as they were engaged in the Swiss Alps this February. They have graduated college, but will be starting grad school in September, getting new apartment, part time work etc and seems like it would be so rushed, not enjoyable to do it so quick in October. Since they thought they had "so much time" they haven't decided on anything. Please offer your suggestions! (how long is too long to hold wedding followed by a late reception?)
(This post was
edited by TWQadmin on Jun 23, 2008, 1:27 PM)
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Jun 24, 2008, 12:15 PM
Post #2 of 4
(253 views)
Re: When to set wedding date and reception
[In reply to]
Dear Mama,
Typically a reception could be held any time within the first year, with traditional elements becoming less appropriate as time goes by. But, if the reception is held too close to the first year mark, it appear to be an anniversary party.
Since the cousins don't seem to have a problem with hosting their weddings so close to each other, another one may not be an issue, especially if your guest list doesn't overlap too much. Other than that, it is their choice when they wish to marry and host their reception. It is all about the pluses and minuses of each choice. And, only they can make that final choice.
Re: When to set wedding date and reception
[In reply to]
Thank you for your reply. They are considering doing a very small private family wedding later this summer/fall by the river(which is what they want)while the brother is still here before going to Iraq Would it be appropriate for them to send out a pix saying they got married and to save the date for next summer? (before the 1 yr mark as you stated) If this is appropriate, any suggestions on wording???? This would help us immensely as we have never seen this done with anyone else before & are wondering the right way to do this??!! I am imagining that everyone would still wear their wedding clothes, bride, groom, attendants & parents to the outdoor reception they really want next summer and not be in such a time crunch with going to grad school this fall and securing the place they want to hold this. Whether the brother will be able to get a leave to come home for the reception is quite questionable, but at least he will have been there for the private ceremony. Thank you so very much for any help you can provide us in this case.
TWQadmin
FORUM EXPERT
/ Moderator
Jun 25, 2008, 1:16 PM
Post #4 of 4
(234 views)
Re: When to set wedding date and reception
[In reply to]
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When to set wedding date and reception
