I recently got engaged about 3 weeks ago. Originally I started making plans to have the wedding in my(Bride) hometown. I have become so stressed out with trying to plan the wedding so I asked my fiance for his help with telling what he wanted out of the wedding. After talking with him, he was saying that he wanted to have the wedding and reception in his hometown. I am from New Orleans, LA and he is from Greensboro, NC. Neither one of our families have the funds to just hop on a plane and travel to another state and also pay for hotel accommodations. And we don't have the funds to help them out either. I feel stuck because I know that it's not ONLY my day and that it's his as well, but I just don't feel comfortable possibly making a grand entrance into a room full of people that I don't know. My fiance says he is okay with having the wedding in New Orleans, but his parents don't seem too thrilled in helping pay for the wedding and I believe its because they don't want to help pay for something that isn't in their hometown. My parent is a single parent and I don't want her to have to take out a loan just give me the wedding that she feels I deserve and that I want (honestly). The wedding and reception total is going to cost $10,000. My fiance and I are giving $3,000 towards the wedding, but his parents seem to have an issue even when asked to contribute $1,000. Leaving my mother to pay $6,000.
What should we do? We have communicated with each other. It just seems like no one is going to be completely happy as of now.
Thanks,
Dana
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Post #2 of 2
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Re: Whose hometown should the wedding be in?
[In reply to]
Dear Dana,
Neither parent is obligated to pay for or contribute to your wedding. It is yours, not theirs. So, it may be best to wait until you can afford the wedding you want and then host it where ever you want.
When you save ample funds for your wedding you can host it with a reception that follows and then host a second informal reception in the other home town.
You could also, host a less expensive wedding now with the two receptions in both locations.
Please remember that all wedding guest are invited to the reception that follows the wedding.
Whose hometown should the wedding be in?
