I have been engaged since Oct 06...yeah...Fiance and I had discussed seriously doing our dream and ideal destination wedding: overseas Poland or New Zealand. However my parents are 8 years older than his and my Dad just got diagnosed w/Parkinsons.
So we initially thought we would do a blessing ceremony/reception in the states and cont. w/our Ideal wedding...however, I really do want my parents to be there for the wedding...I want my Dad to walk me down the isle. But what if he physically can not. Also.. they do not fly.
Help....I want my parents there but I would love to make myself and my future hubby to be happy. And the honeymoon at the "original" destination place will not cut it.
I have gone so far as to research driving distance from where my parents live to a place I would be willing to do a ceremony. FYI I do not want to get married in my hometown. I feel so very selfish!
Thanks...
(This post was
edited by amie on Jul 28, 2006, 10:18 PM)
If you want your parents to attend your wedding, and you dad is ill, you'll have to make this decision very carefully. Once you're married, you're married - there can be no more weddings.
There are many times in life that we all have to make a trade off. You'll have to decide what is most important to you - your parents being able to attend your wedding or having the destination wedding.
It seems to me that a possible consession may be to have your wedding here and then honeymoon in Poland or New Zealand. This makes the most sense since we often hear from familes who have found themselves torn by wanting to be at their family member's destination wedding yet they cannot afford to do so. Your trip sounds like it will be expensive for everyone.
Have lots of discussion and, again, focus on what is most important to you. Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
I completely agree. Plus, we give up quite a few traditional wedding elements when we have destination weddings. The guest list typically is much smaller, so showers are not always appropriate.
In addition, if you had attendants, you would be paying for their lodging. This could be very expensive. Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
Thank you very much for your response. It has been very difficult for me to decide, and it has dragged on for some time. I feel very guilty and more pious as the days and questions add on. "It is MY day" attitude feels so selfish. We are in our mid-thirties, but yes I don't want to look back and regret. We have been engaged since October, so it has become a drawn out decision. It is been trying for my family because of my latest families health concerns. My Dad's diagnosis with Parkinsons a few months ago, has made me concerned if he will even be able to walk down the isle. My mom having had back surgery and will have more before the end of the next year. And since they don't fly, especially now, my brother is willing to drive them wherever I decide for the ceremony. I just feel that I can not make the right decision on either side.
Would it be easier for me, them to have a small blessing ceremony in my hometown and reception in fiance's hometown. And do the elope scene overseas (Poland etc).
Or do I go on hoping my parents will be healthy enough to plan a larger wedding in May? As far as expense issues,frankly we both have a good reserve of savings for a good size budget ($20-40K)available. I am blessed for this, yet still can not decide.
I'm having trouble understanding what you're suggesting. Can you clarify? Top Wedding Questions Forum Moderator - "Write your sorrows in the sand, your blessings in stone".
destination or local?
