First, let me thank you for the fantastic advice given on my posts so far. This website is brilliant. Now, before I get into my question, I don't want to sound like a spoilt brat. In fact, I think just writing this out may help me make some decisions.
When my parents found out that my fiance and I were getting married they were overjoyed and supportive. They offered to give us a lump sum of money to do with what we like. We of course decided that we'd put it towards a wedding in their hometown. I live abroad and having a wedding there did not seem a good option because of high costs for everything. A destination wedding seemed like it would cost everyone else sooooo much money and it felt selfish.
I've now created a situation. Even though my parents have taken a back seat to the planning because they have given me the money and said do with it what you please, by having the wedding in their hometown we have put them in an awkward position. We want to have a wedding on budget so we want to limit numbers. But there are several people (friends and family) connected to my parents who expect invites because we're having it here. This choice is now going to cost us more than the budget my parents are providing. Their gift was not meant to be a burden. It was meant to help us set up. But if we continue to plan the wedding here, we will go further in debt than we already are. I want to invite all those who love us and are expecting to come support us on our day, but we just can't afford it. It's costing us a bundle just for us to fly here from abroad to attend our own wedding.
It really does help just to write it down, but I'd appreciate any ideas or advice. Sometimes, this process seems too stressful. I just want to be married.
(This post was
edited by brooklyn on Aug 9, 2005, 3:02 AM)
Etiquette Now
WEDDING ETIQUETTE EXPERT
Aug 9, 2005, 10:08 AM
Post #2 of 2
(667 views)
Re: [brooklyn] wedding stress with location and parents
[In reply to]
Dear Brooklyn,
No you don't sound like a spoiled brat. Conversely, you sound very considerate. Is there any way that you can find a hall for a nominal fee? I found my wedding and reception venue through my city parks and recreation department. It was perfect and not expensive.
You could have a mid-day ceremony and reception with just cake and beverages, which doesn't cost much either.
With all of the people wanting to share in your day, I'm assuming that they just want to be with you and not expecting a big bash.
Best wishes to you both, Rebecca Black, Etiquette Now
wedding stress with location and parents
